pick up the pieces
by nekocandy4life
Summary: You broke me once; shame on him. You broke me twice; shame on me. Did it once more; life just doesn't mean anything now. Takano leaves Ritsu shattered. Attempting to end his life, Ritsu is saved by a shojo looking prince. Can said prince heal him and piece the broken heart back together? (Give it a chance people please)
1. broken

**Ok so this is a Yukina x Ritsu fanfic.  
Don't like the sound of this, please, don't judge and give it a chance:)  
that's all I ask people!**

**Enjoy~**

"I told you it's not what you think!"

"The hell it is!"

"I'm telling the truth!"

He storms off and though I run after him, trying to explain, he doesn't listen. How did it turn out like this? An chan's the one who initiated the kiss not me. I told her I loved Takano but she still kissed me! Now Takano thinks I was cheating.

"We…should just end it" oh god…no.

"P-please just let me explain"

"NO" don't do this to me! Not again masamune!

"Besides you probably just agreed to date me to get me to stop pestering you."

"That's not true!" I reach for his hand only to be swatted away "Just let me explain"

"Explain what?!" his voice is cold "that you and 'that chick' met and shared a lovely kiss. Is that what you want to explain?!" the aura around him is darkening making me flinch.

Every word pierces me so deeply I can't speak. Silence engulfs us making me want to puke. Why? Everything was finally going smoothly and this had to happen. I was finally happy and even came out to my parents just to be with the man I love…then this had to happen.

He walks away again.

Being me, I don't want us to end! I want to prove my innocence and faithfulness to him!

"I didn't do anything I swear!" I pull his arm to stay "Masamune!" all I see next is a blur and a hand storming madly in my face. My eyes widen and my right cheek stings.

"Don't call me that" the voice is colder than anything I have heard just like the look he is giving me. "See you at work tomorrow." With that, I let go and watch him leave.

* * *

Today is just plain hell for me.

I couldn't sleep a wink yesterday.

I tried calling Takano to no avail.

The sting on my face turned into a ugly bruise.

All i wanted to do was make things right and clear the misunderstanding.

But this...this is too much!

Not being able to sleep, I stayed awake, listening for Takano to come back so i can clear my name.

He came back alright.

I heard him walk into his apartment along with someone else laughing and giggling.

Oh god i don't want to believe it.

He would never do that to me.

No matter how hard i tried to assure myself the sounds next were making me doubt even my dense side.

Cautiously i walk out and towards his apartment.

Nervousness eating away at me I don't knock. Instead i grab hold of the doorknob. Surprised, I find it unlock, so i open it and walk inside. my stomach is becoming more and more upset from the noises that greet me once i enter but i block out the harsh thoughts.

That is...until...I see them.

Under my Masamune, moaning, smiling, panting is none other than the one i trusted most. The one i considered my friend. The one person i never thought bad about, not one bit, regardless of his endless noisiness.

Kisa Shouta.

Like that, my world is broken.

_ You broke me once; shame on him. _

_You broke me twice; shame on me. _

_Did it once more; life just doesn't mean anything now._

**hello~ **

**me again!**

**so yeah like i said in the above notes; THIS IS NOT A TAKANOXRITSU FANFIC sorry guys but this is a RITSUXYUKINA FANFIC!  
no hard feeling but i've been thinking about this for awhile now but procrastinating it.  
that is until i read Misakixxusagi sama's fanfic called 2 HEARTS.  
don't know what that story's about?  
JUMP OVER TO HER STORY AND READ IT.  
its very enjoyable (somewhat sad too) but it boggles your mind!  
anyways so here's chapter one and hoped you enjoyed:)(Cause i don't know when i will be able to post chapter 2)  
REVIEWS PLEASE!**

* * *

**AS YOU CAN SEE THIS IS MY NEW PROFILE 'NEKO CANDY 4 LIFE' HERE I SHALL BE REPOSTING MY STORIES AND FINISHING THEM.**

**PLEASE BE PATIENT WHILE I GET THEM ALL IN ORDER. **

**TRUST ME WHEN I COULDN'T GET INTO MY OLD ACCOUNT I WANTED TO CRY:( AND THIS IS JUST A PAIN BECAUSE I HAVE TO START FROM SCRATCH AGAIN TT_TT **

**OH! I ALMOST FORGOT~**

_**HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY EVERYONE:3**_

**til next time~**


	2. saved

**THANK GOD I SAVED MY STORIES ON MY FLASH DRIVE!**

**Enjoy please~**

Back in my own hole of an apartment I sit on the floor in my hallway. No tears come. No anger rises.  
I just sit and feel…dead.

The horrible sounds died down now but the image is seared in me forever. Bile rise up and I race to the bathroom to throw up my life.

At this point I'm over the 'why' thoughts.

It's crystal clear why and always has been. But being the pathetic idiot I am I blinded myself from the truth. What's the point of fixing 'us' now?

He was never serious about me.

Like a cat, he toyed with me.

Finished throwing my useless guts up, I lay on the tile floor feeling more like shit.  
I don't want to go to work today, nor tomorrow, or even any other day! But I know I can't hide forever.

Like a mechanical robot, I get up and head to my room to get dressed. Who knows. Maybe hell week will distract me from harsh reality.

Life crushes all hope.

I arrive earlier than the rest (since I made sure to leave before takano and Kisa) if we left at the same time…I don't think my heart would have been able to handle that situation.

Ono by one everyone arrives and I'm thankful they say nothing about my bruised cheek.

Mino with his creepy yet genuine smile.

Hatori with his stoic poker face (I sometimes envy him for that.)

Then…Kisa and T-Takano san.

"Ohayo Ritchan!" there is no guilt or shame in my, back stabber, of a friend's voice.  
"Ritchan what's wrong?" what's wrong?! You seriously don't know or is this mocking!

I refuse to speak but I do look up at them to see Kisa's confused face and behind him…Takano's glare. They look so cold.

The scarring images replay in my mind.

Clearer

Louder

And more heart shattering

"Oi we need to talk" Takano tries touching my hair but I slap his hand away, shocking him, and continue to say nothing.

Offended he yells "Oi!" Kisa cuts him off.

"You're pale Ritchan" snapping sounds go off in my head along with sirens.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

"Rit-"

"It's Onodera!" I scream to kingdom come feeling more nauseous than before.  
"Stop calling me by that stupid nick name!"

"Oi calm down!" baka takano is defending him! "Don't raise your voice." Now my blood boils "I have to tell you something now come." Like hell I will!

"F…ou…"

"What?" take a deep breath…

"FUCK YOU!"

Not caring no more I run away and out the building.

I need to get away.

Away from work.

Away from him.

Away from the aching of my heart's plea to go back to him.

**I want it all to disappear!**

As if in a trance, I run on to oncoming traffic, awaiting the cars to end me. When one did come a voice yelled out to me.

"WATCH OUT!"

After some tumbling, rolling, and yelling, I find myself on the sidewalk on the other side wrapped in some guy's arms. He has brown hair like me only lighter and beautiful hazel eyes. Pierces on his ear, he resembles a badass prince but kind looking. He has a smock on with a nametag.

Inwardly I laugh thinking the whole universe must hate me so much that letting me end it and die doesn't do any justice.

This guy sits both of us up and asks "Are you ok?"

I snort.

Am I ok? AM I OK?!

I am everything BUT ok.

"Sorry" why is he apologizing? Did he know my intentions of death? "Your forehead is bleeding."

"Eh?" it's true. Blood is oozing out from a gash on my forehead "Probable from the fall" I muse to myself.

"Do you want me to call a hospital?" alarms go off!

"N-NOO!" they'll ask too many questions! He flinches "S-sorry…" I hide my face with my bangs ashamed as the tears fall "t-thank you for your kindness but…there's no point in helping someone like me."

As if in a manga, I get swooped up bridal style and taken towards the bookstore nearby. Flustered as hell I squeaked "What are you doing?!"

"You're bleeding. You refused to go to a hospital but we need to give you some medical treatment. There's a first aid kit in the storage room of my work."

"Y-you don't have to carry me!"

"But…you're bleeding."

His voice is soft and filled with kindness but also…sadness?

"My name is Yukina Kou, what's yours mister?"

Not really wanting to say my name but that's rude especially when he saved me from…well me.  
"O-onodera Ritsu."

Yukina smiles but it's forced. Finally taking a closer look at the man, he has bags under his eyes like me and they're as lifeless as mine. Did someone hurt him as well?

Why?

He seems so kind so who would want to break him?

Something pulls at my heart.

I guess, from one broken person to another, we understand betrayal.

Who is the one that hurt you?

**In my old account i put your names but i don't know if i should apply them here as well?**

***cries***


	3. heart to heart

_"O-onodera Ritsu" _

Onodera…where do I know that name from?

I cleaned the nasty gash on his head but realizing the band aid won't cover it I search for the wrapping. I noticed him running in the street on my break. My body moved on its own when I saved him.

It sounded odd when he refused to go to the hospital but when looking in his eyes, they reflected mine.

Betrayal

Hurt

Dead

Resembling a lifeless doll, I wonder, who hurt you?

Who crushed him so badly that he would want to end his life?

Sympathy filled my heart and before I can cut myself off I asked "who hurt you?"

Those big doe eyes of his widen "H-how…" so I'm right. There's a dark bruise on his right cheek.

"How did you get this bruise?" he flinches "Was it my fault?" did I hurt him when we fell?

Placing a hand on it Onodera san starts tearing again. Guilt pulls at my chest for being nosy.

"S-sorry" he shakes his head

"I-it's not from the f-fall…"trailing off a bit "M-my…my…"

Girlfriend would fit the sentence but a girl can't be that strong to do that so maybe a boy.

"A 'guy friend' did that to you?" not wanting to offend him I said friend.

He gives me a meek nod but blushes enormously. It's actually cute.

"You know they say talking about it with others can ease the pain." What am I doing? "I don't mind listening." How can I give advice when I'm broken as well?!

He says nothing and the salience is piercing the longer it goes on. Sigh, looks like I will have to take my own advice.

"My boyfriend cheated on me" that gets his complete attention. Progress.  
"I found out yesterday night. My phone was ringing and when I picked it up I heard my lover moaning screaming out some guy's name."

Sympathy covered his face followed by knowing "I-it hurts right…" the tears continue "I-" Hm?  
"We had a misunderstanding."

More tears as he as he tells me how his childhood friend/ex fiancée tried convincing him to marry her but when he said no she kissed him. His lover happened to see and blamed him. When onodera san tried to explain only to get slapped and leave. However he waited for his lover to come at night only to hear noises in his apartment and find said lover fucking another guy. His best friend no less!

After this heart filled story I can't help but feel selfish. Onodera san has it worse than me. He actually saw his lover cheating while I only heard. Why are people so cruel?

"I gave up everything" trembling now, my heart beats seeing the poor guy like this.

"He broke me in high school too…"awe "W-why did I go back? I gave up my pride for him. Came out to my parents for him. I took that painful jump to trust him again…only to be broken…again."

Overwhelmed by this urge to hug him-I do.

I hug him close to me, securing him safely in my chest. He's small…fragile…and broken.

Murmuring now "And I hate that my heart still beats for him." Why? When he broke you? "How? How….do begin to pick up the pieces?"

With soothing circle motions I rub his back hoping it consoles him as sadness envelopes me as well as anger.

Just how could anybody do that?! It's really fucked up. Because of his friend and lover's cruelty, the whole meaning of trust is forever erased in this guy's heart. It's so sickening I just want to punch the crap out his lover.

"And the worst part is I have to work with them" he gave a bitter laugh as the crying dies down a bit but remorse and dread is still apparent in the voice.

"What are their names" not knowing I asked "Just curious…sorry"

"I-it's ok…sorry for crying when this isn't even your problem" a tiny smile form on my mouth at his little apology.

"It's ok…names?" why do I want to know so badly?

He takes a couple breathes (understandable) then replies.

"Takano Masamune (boyfriend) and Kisa Shouta (friend)"

Next…my world turns black.


	4. lunch

**Enjoy~**

Since yesterday's encounter, Onodera san has been occupying my thoughts. Those sad doe eyes are stuck in my memory. To be honest, even though I don't know him well, I am worried about him. I don't want him to try killing himself again.

So thanks to exchanging business cards, here I stand, in the lobby of the Marukawa publishing. The place where all my favorite shojo manga are published.

Thinking that, Kisa san comes to mind.

He works here as well…

Do I really want to risk seeing him?

Just when I'm still healing?

Procrastinating, those green broken eyes flash once more. No, I can't back down. Onodera san has it much worse. With me, Kisa cheated with a stranger. While with Onodera, his lover cheated on him with his friend. Yes…much worse than me.

Sighing deeply, Onodera san needs someone's support through this, this in mind; I walk up to the counter for directions.

Finding the floor the nice secretary lady showed me (she kept staring though) I manage to get to the shojo department in a snap. My walking stops when I run into the one that stabbed my heart mercilessly.

"Y-yukina?!" baring fangs at me, Kisa scowls "What are you doing here?!"

Keeping the hurt out my voice I ask "Where's Onodera Ritsu?" I can't smile at him no more. Not without hurting.

The only satisfaction I get is the look on my ex's face.

"Ritchan?" yes "W-why would you…"

From the office (my guess) we hear something being brutally thrown with a loud 'SMACK' followed by a "OW!" then "Get your ass back here!"

"NO!"

"Onodera!"

Said brunet rushes out holding his head wincing but stops when spots me.  
"Yukina Kun?" that is waaay to formal Onodera san-_- and what with the staple in his head?

Some guy, tall like me, with black hair, and murderous eyes comes out as well yanking Onodera's small wrist.

"Onodera we need to talk!" the look on the poor brunets face stops my heart but he retorts back at the man.

"I don't want to talk!" tries pulling away "Let go!"

I notice he's hiding the gash under those brown bangs. Unsure what to do, I know I must act, so I decide to interfere like this.

"Ritsu san!" when have I called him by first name? Everyone freezes when I launch forward and hug him "You ok?" he's still and blushing crazily "How's your head?" ignoring the tall man's death glare I continue smiling down at the man in my arms.

"Who the hell are you" venom leaks from his voice.

If I had to guess, I say this guy must be Takano Masamune, the one that broke this poor boy.  
Anger rises up in me.

Calm down.

I came here to support and cheer up Ritsu not start a fight.

"Sorry" I bow politely "My name is Yukina Kou. I came here to check how Ritsu was doing."

"Check?" suspicious? Grrr…don't you have any trust in your lover?! Are they still even lovers?

"Hai" I bring his bangs up showing Takano the gash "He didn't tell you?" bet not since it's all your fault!"

"Onodera…" the voice is menacing and I see how he scares Ritsu crap-less.

I answer for him "He was almost hit by a car." Shock covers Takano's face "I happen to see him in time and save him." Physically that is…

"Why didn't you tell me?" he interrogates Ritsu as my hand gets harshly slapped away.

"I-it's not important…"

"Hell it is. You could have died!" calm down man.

"But I didn't!"

"Thanks to someone else idiot!" this is getting out of control! "Watch for cars next time dumbass!" Oi! That's it!

How can he treat him like that?

I pull the small man away. People are staring now.

"Do you have to work now Ritsu?" I hope not. You look as if you're going to fall over.

He shakes his head a bit, I see some tears at the corner of his emerald eyes "I-it lunch time…" I pull the staple out his head and smile gently.

"Oh then let's have lunch together!" the two cheaters are gaping at us in disbelief.

It still aches to see my Kisa san but when Onodera came it lessens. Could it be because we both are going through the same pain?

"Well?" the look of dread on his small face makes me nervous. Maybe I'm scaring him I mean we just met yesterday…dam it he's talking!

"What was that sorry?"

Weakly "Ok I'll get lunch w-with you." Relief floods me. Why?

We leave the two heart breakers alone ending up at this nice little café. It's simple but has a really nice flow around the place but…

"Onodera san, aren't you going to eat anything?" all he ordered was coffee.

He tenses "Ano…to be frank, I hardly eat."

I hope he isn't starving himself.

"I'm not" a pink color lightens his face.

"Eh?"

"You said you hoped I wasn't starving myself." Now I blush.

"S-sorry" embarrassing…

"It's ok" he gives a sweet half smile. It's small but real. "I have stomach problems" he explains "ever since I was a child so eating things is problematic sometimes."

I see… "But doesn't stress make the pains worse?"

Shrugging "Yes but I've grown use to them." He looks down "especially when I began working in shojo."

"You're not fond of shojo?" then why work there?

He shakes his head "That's not it…" those eyes droops "It's a long story that I rather not recall please."

"Sorry" I feel sheepish now-_-lll

"Pssh…" huh? Is he…chuckling?

Yes, Onodera Ritsu is chuckling and I can't help admire the sound of his laugh.

It's cute.

Smiling as well I ask "Did I say something funny?" he must have taken the question wrong because that sweet laughter stops.

"N-no, it's just…you apologize me than I do." That smile is nervous now but still sweet.

I wish he'll smile more.

"You should smile more." Crap! Why did I speak that out loud?! Think of an excuse!

"W-well since we met (Yesterday) you looked so sad and um…it doesn't suit you…uh...but smiles do. You should smile more." I sound like a friggin creep!

But he does!

His pink lips quiver a bit but it goes into a brilliant smile!

"Wow…" shocking how beautiful it is0_0 "SEE!" I squeal "Tears definitely don't suit you but smiles are perfect!" that's cheesy.

A scarlet blush caresses his pale cheeks cutely but he changes the subjects.

"S-so um…what d-do you do? Judging from your looks, you're in college right?"

"Amazing, how did you know?"

"I can tell."

"Oho~ well yes I am. I'm an art student."

"ART!" His face brightens.

"Do you like art?"

"Hai, well I'm not all that good but it use to be a hobby of mine when I was younger."

Younger?

"How old are you if I may ask?" face-palm-_-

"25 going on 26 and you?" that's not old at all.

"Just turned 22."

"When?"

"Last month"

"Well happy late birthday then." I really do like his smiles.

"Thank you"

"What did you do for your birthday?"

Sigh…it was actually a sad day.

"I was alone. My ex forgot my birthday and didn't meet me." It's that sad look again.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm fine" am I?

An idea strikes me making me grin "Say Ritsu" Onodera is too formal for me "You say you use to do art. Can you draw me something as a late gift?" pleasantly he agrees taking out a pen and paper.

"What do you want me to draw?"

Hmm…"How about a dove with a rose in its beak?" minutes pass and I am watching him draw, erase, shade, everything. Down to the last details.

"It's beautiful…" My breath has been blown away. He said he wasn't all that good but that's a lie! He's really talented!

The dove is swooping down gracefully with a full bloomed rose in its beak. It looks cartoonish but at the same time realistic with every feathers drawn so carefully. And the shading of it all makes everything pop.

We're so busy concentrating on the drawing (Me concentrating on him) we didn't even touch our orders.

"You're amazing!" I shout when he finishes. His smile this time is the biggest and brightest of all the others.

_Ba-bump_

Huh?

My heart just—

"Thanks…" he stops "wait, what time is it?"

"What?" time? "5:01"

Apprehension fills his doe eyes "Uwaah! I have to get back to work!" he jumps out the chair gathering his things "Sorry Yukina san but I must leave now."

My heart drops hearing this but I understand. Its work; I do hope we can chat like this again though.

"C-could we talk again some other time?" please say yes please!

"Sure. It's nice talking to someone." Again, those bright smiles amaze me.

Once out the door I catch his ex Takano san from the corner of my eye getting up from a booth in the corner. Said man comes towards me.

"Nice to see you again Takano Kun." Jerk!

"**LEAVE ONODERA ALONE."**

***snap***

"He is** MINE**"

Dufuq he didn't!

"Funny" I lace my voice with as much coldness as his "Says the man that cheated on him with my lover!" traitors! "And yet you have the galls to claim him as yours."

He dumps cold coffee on me.

"What the hell do you know!"

"That you hurt an innocent person!" anger radiates out of me as his fist swings towards me.

**CLIIIIIIIIFY!**

**Battle between semes MUHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**How will this go?**

**Review and tell me what you think please ^_^**

**I will give you mental hugs if you do:)**

**Bye~**


	5. confrontation

"Ke…ke…OOOF!" dodging the fist by mere inches, the princely man flipped the table on me, kicking me in the stomach. I growled, charging full speed at him.

Who the hell does he think he is?!

Coming in and touching what's mine!

Talking to him.

Flirting with him!

Why does everyone want Ritsu?!

Just leave MY property alone dammit!

Using a small pepper shaker that was on another table, I slammed it in his face, and kneed him hard. He tumbled on a family's dinner.

And how the hell does he know about me sleeping with someone else—

Shit!

Does this mean Ritsu knows?!

Fuck!

But he started it! Ritsu is the one who cheated first! Who knows how many men/women he slept with behind my back!

Lost in thought, I stupidly left myself open, which the bastard took. Socking me in the eye then charging at my torso sending me out the café's window. I know for a fact I am bleeding like crazy but do I give a fuck, hell no!

A woman in the background is screaming as I grit my teeth and get up. An elbow lodgings in my side causing me to howl like an animal. Shit he isn't as weak as I hoped.

"Che!" picking up the closet thing by me (which happen to be a piece of broken chair) I aim high readying to launch at the motherfucker's face.

"Someone call the police" someone yells but we don't stop. He has a piece of the table we broke readying to attack me too.

"Fuck the police" I breathe, I just want to kill this guy!

* * *

The plan of murder failed.

After literally 2 hours of fighting and hitting each other with everything the cops eventually came and cuffed us. We were then taken to the hospital for our fucked up injuries.

And you think during all that they would separate us, but no, they placed us in the same room.

My only pleasure after all this.

I broke bastard's right leg during our duel.

On the down note; he broke my nose and sprain my wrist.

But at least I can still walk!

To my relief the cops aren't interrogating us or even pressing charges! They just brought us here then left! Part of me was smug about it but then the rest froze when my lil kohai came in with Kisa!

If Ritsu knows about me and Kisa…I am going to have to come clean.

"Ritsu I—"not even listening to me, he goes to the Blondie and bows!

"Forgive me!" his bangs cover his face "This is my fault, I will take all responsibility!"

Tsk!

"Onodera! Don't apologize to the son of a bi—"

"Do not apologize please." Cutting me off like that, the prince looking man has the balls to ruffle MY boyfriend's brown locks! "This is my fault so don't take the blame ok?"

Ritsu's face is flushing red which pisses me off. Only I am allowed to make him flush! Me and ONLY me!

"B-but it is my fault!" he squeaks "Your leg is broken because of me!"

"STOP IT!" although hurting (you have no idea) I launch up and yank his wrist pulling him away from the guy. He shouts.

"T-takano san!" angry I shout back.

"Shut the hell up!" I feel him flinch but don't care.

"Please let go."

Red.

That's all I see.

"Let go?" bitter laughter "LET GO?!" you have got to be kidding me! "First you go off and cheat with that chick and now this guy and you expect me to let go?! Tell me Ritsu, how much of a slut are you that no one satisfies you huh, HUH?!"

Snapping me from my berserk mode he bites my arm making me let go and shout;  
"I NEVER ONCE CHEATED!"

His eyes are hazy and rimmed with tears with no light in them at all.

"It was going to be a surprise…"

"Hah?" cheating on me was the surprise?!

"I did everything…just to be…with…you. Stayed in shojo…came out to my parents….trusted once more and all for you!"

He came out? Really?

"And the reason I met An chan was to get through her mind that I loved you and told her to stop pestering me. When I said that she kissed me but you assumed it was me! Why? Why don't you ever trust me? I wait up all night that day for you to come back only to find you fucking my friend! And I'm the unfaithful one!?"

"Ritsu—"

"Shut the hell up Masamune!" I did. "I knew you were never serous. You were only toying with me. I knew…but I still…loved you…" what do I say? What can I say…

"How long?"

"Eh?"

Ritsu's eyes were darker now "How long has 'IT' been going on?"

Seconds turned to minutes with no words exchanged.

"Tell us Kisa san" Yukina spoke up causing my raven chibi subordinate to jump.

"Eto…um…" he was eyeing us all (mostly Yukina and Ritsu) before he spoke hiding behind me.  
"L-last year but we stopped once you two started dating…until, whenever you guys got into a fight…he…always went to m-me…I'm sorry Yukina, Ritchan."

Blank.

Lifeless.

Dead.

All that in those glass green orbs…

My beloved stood there trembling so much now, he looked as if his legs would give out.

I want to apologize.

Take this all away.

But I can't.

I reach for him only to be flinched at and ran away from.

"RITSU!" don't go!


	6. reach for me

_**REVIEW~**_

**So far; **_**lil Ritsu is cheated on by Takano with his own friend Kisa who broke Yukina's heart. So Ritsu (being the dramatic queen he is) attempts suicide by throwing himself in traffic only to be saved by Yukina. They bond (whether known or not). Next day Yukina goes to Ritsu's work to check on him and invites him to lunch in front of their cheaters! They had a good time but when Ritsu leaves Takano picks a fight with Yukina and DEATH BATTLE! Sadly (or not) no one dies but are sent to the hospital which leads to confrontation (Don't know, please go to chapter 5). **_

_**Hope this helps, back to meh (wish) lil Ritsu~**_

My body shacked so much it felt as if I would collapse on the ground. This information was unbearable but thinking about more the dots connected in my mind. I was so stupid! All those times we fought and he left to go 'drink' or 'clear' his mind, lies! Knowing the truth upset my stomach even more and made my body feel disgusting.

Disgusting…

I wanted so badly to slap Takano and kick Kisa but it's no good. It won't satisfy my anger nor my pain. Just wanting to get the hell out of their presence, I ran away. No not outside, not again anyways, my stomach and heart feels even more like shit left to rot. All threatening to come up, so I ran to the nearest utility room.

Once more I threw my life up. Just…how much more anguish will I have to go through to see light? Is there even a happy ending?

I recall a time when everything was just so pure…and innocent.

Those days, when I was 'Oda', stalking Saga senpai.

That day I confessed my love for him.

Oh how happy I was when he did date me.

He was my first.

My first crush, first boyfriend, first love, and I gave him everything.

My heart

My soul

…my body…

Even after I went abroad he still occupied my heart, not allowing me to start anew and find happiness.

I laughed bitterly.

Where did I go wrong? It was when I met him is where I went wrong. If we haven't met I wouldn't have had to go through the shit I went through. The headaches. The pain, the guilt, everything he would say to me or the taunting he did…they all inflicted me badly.

I threw up once more.

"Please…someone…where do I pick up these pieces?"

As expected, no one's here to answer. Once abandoned, always abandoned.

Anger washes over me.

Life is just a bitch!

Why is it when someone needs help I am there but when I am crying for help I'm left alone!

Why is it I am the one to reach out when no one reaches for me!

Sure people cry on my shoulders but when I need a shoulder to cry on they turn away!

It's cruel…

But I know.

This is all my fault.

I am the one that choose this path.

I choose to trust, to love…and to fall.

No one else is to blame but me.

Like the emo maniac I am, I start banging my head hard on the toilet bowl. I want to bleed to bruise to feel anything but my emotions. Hopefully sooner or later if I hit myself hard enough I will get amnesia and forget everything.

The door creaks open but I don't care if a stranger finds me like this. They don't care anyways! Let them find me and is they are a killer perfect!

"Ritsu don't!"

Hands pull me away from my self-abusing and out the stall.

"Leave me alone!" blood is dripping in my eyes so I can't see good but I scream anyways.  
"Hanaseou! Go away!" strong arms embrace me tightly.

I don't know this smell…

It smells…intoxicating in a good way that it's calming.

"Please Ritsu…" eh, this voice… "Don't hurt yourself please…"

"Y-Yukina…?" something wet falls on my face as my vision blurs more. It's warm… "Are you crying?"

"Yes." Keh… "I know we don't know each other well Ritsu, but please, don't throw your life away as if it's nothing. Don't let someone selfish like that ruin you. I promise you…if you ever need a shoulder or someone to lean on or look to, let me be the one. I will take you out from the dark so please…don't hurt yourself anymore."

W-what is he saying?!

These words…they touch somewhere in my heart…

"…ry…" I mumble.

"What was that?" his voice is velvet soft and gentle which make me tear more. Like a precious infant, Yukina rock me back and forth patting my head saying sweet nothings. What is it with him that makes me feel like I can trust him?

"Sorry."

Nausea is beginning to wash over my body. For support I cling to Yukina's chest.

"Oi Ritsu!" the soft voice is getting fainter "stay awake, I'll get someone!" no…don't leave…

"St…a…y" I cling tighter "Pl..ease…"

My heavy eyelids close themselves and send me to a bright-less slumber of no end. Just me and the dark; but then, why do I get the sensation of being carried?

"Don't die" Yukina's voice says "I won't leave you so don't leave me ok."

Such kindness…

What is this fluttering in my chest?

Haven't I felt this before but where?

Ah!

This is the feeling I killed off long ago in high school.

How could this one stranger bring this feeling back from the dead?

What does this mean?

Is this…_love?_


	7. let me pick up the pieces

_**Still starting from scratch people *cries* but it has to be done 0_0 **_

_**So just to warn you guys! This chapter might be a bit confusing because I mixed their povs together. I will separate them with lines but to be on the safe side, I shall tell you the order of character's povs!**_

_**1: we have Yukina *beams***_

_**2: can't forget lil Ritsu *agony***_

_**3: …and Takano *dodges stapler of doom* **_

_**He's mad at me for making him more of a douche than he really is *laughs***_

_***gets hit in the head with a ruler* **_

_**Ow! TT^TT**_

_**Hope you enjoy~**_

Seeing the guy like that made me forget my own self-pity and rage, my only concern was Ritsu's well-being at the moment.

Takano san tried approaching the shaking brunet only to be flinched out.

"Ritsu!" he yelled as said person ran out the room.

What exactly is this tugging in my chest? It's hard to explain this feeling…it is not sadness I know that but…I don't know. Like a magnet is all I can describe it. Pulling me to go to the brunet and comfort him.

But I can't.

Not without knowing the reason why we were done wrong!

"Yukina…" Kisa san's voice was slightly below a murmur.

I look at him.

The man I fell for.

The man I loved.

The man I put before myself and my desires.

And yet…I don't feel anger, not anymore that is.

My heart still aches yes but I realized it's not as much anymore. But that's not right…all this only happened yesterday and yet I'm beginning to heal.

Why?

I stand up and face the two "Just tell me this Kisa san, Takano san…why?"

Their eyes widen at my words but Kisa san is the one to answer me.

"…I don't know…"

Ah…such poor words.

Limping pass them, carrying the broken pieces of my heart, I whisper into my once beloved's ear.

_"Goodbye…Kisa san."_

And walk out.

Not sure where to go anymore, I wonder around aimlessly, ignoring the stares I get from other people. Until I pass a restroom; from there, noises of regurgitating resonate from inside.

Poor person I think, is he sick?

Pondering this I hear a faint cry.

Pressing my ear to the door I hear a voice cry "Please…someone…where do I pick up these pieces?" alarms go off. Ritsu?!

Banging noises echo out along with his unstable breathing and screams.

Now, having a heart attack myself, I throw open the door and at the end of the room, in the last stall, I find the man brutally hitting his head on the toilet seat so much he's bleeding!

"Ritsu don't!" I exclaim putting a stop to his self-abusing.

"Leave me alone!" he thrashes and more blood comes out "Hanaseou! Go away!" no I won't!

Embracing him tightly I bring his head to my chest ignoring the blood getting on my shirt. Blood gets in his eyes so I don't think he can properly see me.

"Please Ritsu…" I choke out "Don't hurt yourself please…"

"Y-Yukina?" my tears fall on his cheek and he gives a disbelieving look "Are you crying?"

"Yes" I admit truthfully. I don't want him to hurt himself or lose his life because of Takano. Please smile; show me your happy bright face like in the café! Don't break…please…

With all these new emotions, I think I know why I'm getting over my broken heart fast.

It's because _of_ Ritsu.

In these two days…I fell in love with him.

And I want to help him.

"I know we don't know each other well Ritsu, but please, don't throw your life away as if it's nothing. Don't let someone selfish like that ruin you. I promise you…if you ever need a shoulder or someone to lean on or look to, let me be the one. I will take you out from the dark so please…don't hurt yourself anymore."

I spoke out my heart.

He gave a look of pure shock as if no one has ever told him this.

Wait…has ANYONE ever been by his side to begin with?

He looks touched by my words "…ry…"

"What was that?" my concern grows so, like a child, I cradle him and rock him back and forth gently.

Tearing up more he says "Sorry."

Something is wrong. He starts clinging to my chest as he wavers.

"Oi Ritsu!" his eyes are shutting "stay awake, I'll get someone!" before I can he clings to me tighter.

"St…a…y" my heart jumps "Pl..ease…"

Those green jewels close and I go full panic mode. Swooping him up I made no stop to bolt out the restroom (even with a broken leg) and to one of the doctors.

"Don't die" I say to him hoping he can hear "I won't leave you so don't leave me ok."

Please…don't leave me just when I fell for you.

* * *

Waking up must have been the WORST mistake of my life.

Imagine, finding out a truth that breaks you so much you run to a bathroom and bash your head on the porcelain toilet bowl. Then…can't remember after that but either way waking up in a hospital bed with your head wrapped up and alone.

Not my idea of a 'good morning'.

The doctors are keeping me here under observation. They say I might have a concussion from all that self- inflicting and besides that I'm fatigued.

I hate hospitals, they creep the hell out of me. Yeah I visit people IN the hospital but when I'm the patient…it's a whole other story.

It's bee HOURS and god am I feeling restless!

I just want to do something…anything to keep my mind off what happened yesterday and the blur from after my abusing.

I wish I had someone to talk to.

As if magic (or possible due to the medication they have me on) a knock grabs my full attention. My heart jumps out my chest at the visitor.

Holding a vase of flowers and work bag, Yukina beams in at me making my chest flutter. What is wrong with me?

"Ritsu." _Ba-bump_

"W-what am you doing here?" ah! That's sounded so rude! "N-not that I mind it's just I don't remember what happened and…um…"

Smiling that bright smile he sets the flower on the seal on the window.

"Due to what happened in the bathroom yesterday, and your healing body, I volunteered to be your personal caretaker for the time being!"

"E-eh?!" I rush up only to get dizzy "You don't have to! It's very unnecessary and I don't want to be a burden besides you have a broken leg and your job and school, so don't worry about me! After all, you don't even know me that well so my problems aren't your concern so…"

"I want to." My mouth clamps.

"W-why?" You've been so nice since we met but why? "Y-you…are always nice but why…to a stranger like me…? You even stuck up to Takano for me…but why? You got hurt as well by Kisa so why care about a stranger's problem?" it makes no sense!

"He played with your heart"

_**Ba-bump**_

These words flustered me, I could feel my cheeks heating up fiercely but decided to dismiss them and change the subject. I don't want to feel this way, I can't, it will only lead me to hurting myself again.

"How'd you end up with _HIM?" _he doesn't even have to say the name for me to know who HE is. But why ask that out of everything?!

Sighing, I don't want to relive my past, but he doesn't relent.

"Ritsu" his velvet voice softens it soothes me "I just want to know how someone as sweet as you ended up with a person…like that." His bright features turn a bit eerie dark (sort of like Mino's) but I don't believe it's because of me. Surprising huh since I piss about everyone off.

Sighing again I give in. what the hell, my life is already shit so just one more to add to my misery won't be as bad I guess.

"He wasn't always like that" I recommence our high school days "We went to the same high school until I went abroad to England. During those times…I fell in love with him the day we met and…well I guess you could say I was kind of a stalker not really" blushing "he was always quiet and alone so but very kind so I just fell for him more. One day it was just too much and I ended up confessing." The images play in my mind and everything just pours out. "I was so incredibly happy when we started dating I thought my heart would explode from the pure joy. But…due to a suppose misunderstand (according to him) my heart…I couldn't stand it and I left abroad like a coward."

Was that whole thing about the misunderstanding even true?! He's been lying to me all this time, who knows if he lied to be back then as well.

Since this is all out on the table now my mouth won't shut up!

"I tried moving on by drowning in work but couldn't. I never could get over him maybe that's the reason I went back." Shame, that's all I feel ashamed. Closing up my heart didn't do me any good. Against Takano, those feelings I kept burring last year just continued to resurface and come back in full force.

To my nonstop amazement, I thought I would be taunted, laughed at, or called stupid but no. Yukina simple got up and hugged me tightly.

"You were already broken to begin with huh?" he says under his breath in my ear.

This simple gesture is unbearably sweet but I don't…want…it.

Stop pounding heart!

Didn't you learn anything?!

"It's my fault."

"What?!"

"It's no one else's fault but mine for breaking my own heart"

"That's not true." He cups my face "you only wanted to love and be loved in return." He pauses and gazes at me with a look Takano use to give but kinder and not…forceful.

"I want to piece back your heart won't you let me?" Yukina's slender fingers caress my cheeks making me flush me. Leaning in closer he says in a husky voice which I find calming.

_"let me pick up the pieces"_


	8. what happened to 'us?

_When you love someone, you place yourself bare in front of them._

* * *

Just the thought of that scares me even more than before now.

It'll only shatter my heart more…then again this beating muscle is already dust anyways.

I know this but I don't want to break his embrace.

It's warm

_Not pushy_

Kind

_Not forceful_

Gentle

_Nowhere near abusive _

And…_**loving.**_

Then there his scent; intoxicates me with this unexplainable warm sensation. I close my eyes and breath it all in. He smells of cologne and paint with a bit of a flower scent but mostly paints.

"You smell like cherry blossom." Huh? "It's a very lovely smell" that smile blinds me.

"You smell like paints." Oh god! Why did I have to say that?! Now he thinks I hate the smell.  
"Not that I mind! I like the smell of paint! In fact back in my school days I would sometimes smell the paints in art class! Wait it's not like that! It's just…" god I'm a idiot!

"Ritsu" it sounds sweet coming off his tongue "its ok there's nothing wrong with what you said so don't be so insecure."

Somehow, without me noticing, he laid himself on the hospital bed placing me on his chest.

He's trying to kill me with the way he's making my heart beat.

Those arms get tighter. I wonder if Yukina can hear my fast pulse. I really do hope not.

"That's loud."

Crap!

"Can't you hear it? My heart."

Oh.

It's just like mine or is it?

It's hard to tell which is the one beating loud.

_What is it about being with you that makes me act so out of character?_

* * *

Where the hell is Onodera?!

He couldn't have ran away like in high school right?

Damn.

I will hunt his ass down if he did and…_**what?**_

I want to apologize and be taken back.

I want to fix us.

Why did I do it in the first place?

Old habits die hard I guess.

Back when he left me the first time I forgot him by sleeping around.

What an idiot I was and am.

No!

Erase those thoughts, I can still fix us!

Did it before, I'll do it again!

But that doesn't prevent me from looking back at the deserted seat of my love.

If only I knew where he is!

**"TAKANO"**

Urg!

Out of everyone why does it have to be Isaka? Especially when I'm in the 'kill' mood right now!

Don't have the patience to put up with his crap today.

"What'd you want Isaka?" I growl finally looking at his mug.

It's…grim?

"Get over here now." His voice is menacing, not his usual playful tone.

This must be serious.

We go into the lounge room when he turns to me, plain anger and worry written on his face, and goes off.

"Tell me what you did."

Dafuq?

"Dunno what you mean." Piss him off yeah but it's the truth!

"Come on Takano!" he puts both hands in the hair "you drive Onodera Kun crazy yes but to the point of suicide...come on, even you know when enough, enough!"

Hold on effing minute "Suicide?!" now I'm grabbing him by the shoulders demanding "What do you mean **suicide**?"

"He was found by some guy (a friend I think) whacking his head on a toilet bowl in the hospital AFTER visiting YOU! They had to stitch his head and keep him there." He shoves my hands away "We all know he was already mentally struggling (with family/status and you to top it off) but this Takano. What the hell have you done this time?"

"That is NONE of your business" fuck, now I feel even more like a prick. Just great.

"Takano. We do not need a suicidal employee and his parents are sure to have heard about this.  
GO. CHECK. ON. HIM"

"You don't have to tell" I was already gonna do that.

"Then go and apologize to his parents!"

Haah…

Good thing I drove today.

The clouds are dark as hell!

Calming I stroll in through the doors and to the assistance counter; the girl working there flushes at me but I'm in no mood to mess with her.

"What can I 'do' for you sir?" she winks.

Poor idiot.

Doesn't even know I bat for the other team.

Just plain stupid.

"Can you tell me what room Onodera Ritsu's in?" hurry stupid slut!

"Aha! He is in room 4201"

"Thanks" for the hell of it I wink at her which makes her sequels.

As I walk my feet become lead thinking, what do I say to him?

Do I just apologize?

Before I have any time to think of what to say I'm already standing before the door of ritsu's room only to retreat when I hear _"You smell like cherry blossoms"_

Dafuq is that bastard doing here? And all alone with MY Ritsu!

Then my said lover (I am so NOT breaking up with him) says _"you smell like paints."_

Not even in the room and I can picture his face now.

Flustered and embarrassed while trying to fix what he just said. He has never been good at talking with others and mostly awkward.

But—

I never knew he liked painting.

How come he never told me but he told this guy?

Veins pop everywhere when I hear the prince guy say _"Let me pick up the pieces."_

Stay calm Masamune…

Ritsu won't listen to him so don't make the same accusing.

But it doesn't stop,

"_That's loud" _? _"Can't you hear it? My heart."_

ENOUGH!  
I slam the friggin door open and see MY Ritsu on top of that Yukina!

"Takano?"

Hate fills every fiber of my body.

What am I doing?

I remember the day you came back.

Once I found out it was you I vowed to never lose you again or let anyone hurt you even if that person was myself.

And yet, here I am, doing the exact opposite.

Yanking you, bruising your delicate flesh, and saying every hurtful thing in the book.

What happened to 'us'?

Where did we go?

Now we just bite and scratch; I pull, you push.

"Is this revenge?"

"Let go! I don't know what you mean by 'revenge'— Owe! Takano san!"

"So after all this you just leave to fuck the next guy!"

"Let go of him!"

"Back off prince or do you want me to break the other leg!"

God, stop it me!

But I can't.

I just continue to drag my lover's struggling body out the hall.

His screams, cries, and begs all fall on deaf ears because this demon I've become just don't care and doesn't even stop when it sees Ritsu's wrapped head bleeding. It just wants to hurt him more.

"Oi cut that out!" a doctor with the help of (2 or 3) more doctors, they manage to subdue me.

In the distance I see Yukina cradling Ritsu and some elders running towards them shouting out ritsu's name and for me to get kicked out and away from their son.

So those are his parents huh.

Fuck.


	9. demons

_We all have demons._

_Guess that's why I did it._

_Am I sorry?_

**_Not at all._**

_The demon won't let me feel sorry for Onodera._

_It enjoyed breaking the kid._

**_The only regret is that Yukina got hurt as well._**

I could always win him back

_Is what filled my twisted mind._

_But seeing him so nice and friendly with Onodera san…_

**_Awoke the demon once more_**

_And now he is angry._

_What is it with that brunet?_

_He is so stupid and dense!_

**_Why would ANYONE love him?_**

_I have to fight to be loved, looked at, and shined upon._

_While he doesn't fight only attracts._

**_Every fiber of me hates him._**

_The innocence in those ugly green puke for eyes sickens me to the core._

_A menace to my spot light._

**_For that, he NEEDS to die._**

_And I swear on my grave I will see to it that he does._

_Maybe then you will stay broken_

**_Ritchan._**


	10. parents will always worry

**10…**

**10 chapters….**

**I…have…10 chapters…so far.**

**Lol sorry had to out that (was watching the devil inside) so forgive the randomness:3**

* * *

Wtf man!?

I so want to beat the fuck out this guy!

How dare he treat Ritsu like that, after all he done, isn't it enough!

The bastard didn't even stop when the poor guy bled!

Did Takano always treat him like this?

From the way said brunet fights back I take it, it is.

Fists balled, I advance forward but not fast enough (Damn leg).

"Let go!" I barked but got threatened.

"Back off prince or do you want me to break the other leg!"

Thank god the jerk got tackled down by some doctors.

I rushed to Ritsu's side and cradle him in my arms. These two old people come up to us with the doctor and tell Ritsu to stay awake. The doctor wraps his head again and takes him from me to put him back in bed (since my leg is broken).

I go back in too followed by the elders, we surround him.

"Ritsu honey…" the lady says.

"Mother?" shock covers his face "W-what are you doing here a-and with father?"

Mother…father…so these are his parents.

"I-I thought you guys never wanted to see me again."

"Oh Ritsu…" sighs the father "We thought so but you're still our child and after…"

The mom finishes for him "After what the doctor told us we panicked! How could we not? So we thought long and hard." Deep breath "We are still uneasy about your sexuality but as you father said, you are still our child, my baby, and we want to support you. Ritsu, no matter what, we love you and will never turn our backs against you ever EVER again. Please forgive us."

She grabbed hold of his small hand and squeezed them. The fear and anxiousness clouded her tearful eyes to the rim.

What will you say Ritsu?

If I were him, I would be angry for getting disowned and then renowned but Ritsu, his heart isn't like that I guess or else his answer would have been different.

"How could I?" they went wide eyes "How could I or can I not forgive you? You both are my parents and I love you guys. All I wanted was your acceptance when I came out and now that I have it…just how can I not forgive you?"

Like mother and son, they broke into sobs; one for happiness as I can see, but the other, I can see it's for a totally different reason.

Now that everyone is calm, Mr. Onodera senior asked "So who are you?" to me "Ritsu's boyfriend?"

I can see Ritsu clearly stiffen but doesn't answer.

As much as I want to say "Yes!" I can't. things have to go slow if I want Ritsu to move on with me. He's been through enough. So I say honestly "I am his friend" bow "Yukina Kou."

"Friend?" they give confused looks "But then who's the boyfriend?"

Nothing.

Then it dawns on them.

"Ritsu…" his head slumps down "It wouldn't happen to be that guy earlier would it?"

He makes no eye contact but the pain is evident on his face.

"H-he…was…but" suddenly, scaring both of us white the women jumped to him demanding;

"WHAT DID HE DO!?" fire flared in her green eyes mirroring her child's "WELL? HE HURT YOU SO WAS HE ABUSIVE? DID HE THREATEN YOU IN ANY WAY? WAS HE JUST TOYING WITH YOUR HEART?** DID HE CHEAT ON YOU?**"

BINGO!

Right on the spot Mrs. Onodera chan!

And from your son's defeated broken look you can see that too.

And the rage just grows "DAMN THAT MAN!" hugging her son "HOW DARE HE CHEATS ON MY BABY!"

Some guy with blue eyes and brown hair comes in and sadly for him he has to face the woman's wrath.

"ISAKA SAN!" wow, they know each other "I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU WOULD SEND SOMEONE TO APOLOGIZE TO US BUT YOU SEND THE ONE WHO MESSED MY CHILD UP!"

Urgently he bowed low "I didn't know Takano would do something like that. I humbly apologize and want to make it up to you and Onodera."

"HOW?! HOW ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE IT UP?!"

Her husband had to calm her down "Let the man finish Rika." She huffs in annoyance but complies.

Isaka goes to Ritsu but I stay close afraid of what he MIGHT do.

"Onodera san" he starts "I apologize for all you went through and believe you need a break from all of this. Hatori and Mino will handle your manuscripts while you're on vacation and I'll see to it that Takano san gets the punishment he deserves."

"No you really don't have to"

"I want to. You need it and before I forget, you live by Takano right? Would you like me to get you a hotel so you can get away from him?"

He lives by him!

"N-no…I'll figure out what to do, thank you."

Bowing low once again; the man left.

"You live by him?" I felt sad when he nodded.

"It wasn't intentional" explaining "When I moved last year it just happened to be by his apartment."

"Oh" relief but… "What are you going to do? Isn't it going to be harder since you're neighbors?"

Another nod "I'll figure something out."

"You can live with us!" Rika exclaimed.

"No. it's too far from my job. I'll just put up with it and save til I have enough to move somewhere else I guess."

NO!

"You can live with me."

They all looked at me (mostly Ritsu) blushing.

"I don't mind Ritsu. You can live with me."

"That's imposing too much!"

"Ok ok calm down." The dad intervenes "Thank you Yukina kun but I think our son needs time to think so for now…I think he needs something to clear his head."

Understandable but…I would have liked living with their son.

"Clear his head…well since he has a vacation now why don't we go on a family trip?"

I want to laugh when Ritsu goes completely white.

A trip sounds good for him.

I wish to go with him.


	11. he wasn't always like that

You know when so much emotion floods though you that the barriers you spent half your life making just crumbles down and leave you vulnerable but wanting more.

Its like when you go on that one ride your friend drags you on and once it starts you feel;

**Nervous**— of what to expect.

**Happy**— when nothing scary happens.

**Insecure**— when you go up and up to the top.

**Scared**— at the very top and starts doubting that the ride will be fun after this.

**Horrified**— once you shoot down at so much speed it's sickening!

Then last but not least;** angry.**

Angry at your friend for making you go on the ride but relief because you survived and off it.

**Relief** is the last stage but I haven't reached that part yet.

I'm still stuck on angry (truth be told).

I can't help but be sizzling hot mad at everyone at this moment!

I just want to go back in time, back on that ride, where all was at the happy stage and stay there instead.

"It'll do you some good" mother chimes.

"Get your mind off things" father joins.

Haha, guess they sense my bipolar mood swings when they go quiet.

A good five or seven minutes go by before mom starts up again with "Yukina Kun can come too!"

Said man blushes just as madly as me.

"Uh…mom…" please just leave me to curl inward and drown in depression.

"I would love to" say what!

My only light in this black abyss (Yukina) places his large hands on my shoulders and looks my family in the eyes "I would like to join if Ritsu allows me to."

_Ba-bump!_

How can I say no to him?

The only one that reached out to a stranger like me.

He did so much in so little time. It took Takano a WHOLE year for me to trust him.

Trust?

Do I trust Yukina that fast?

"What about school? I don't want to hold you back and become more of a burden than already am."

"You're not a burden" the hands tighten and his soft cinnamon eyes are begging me like a lost puppy to say ok.

Sigh.

Puppy eyes are my weakness and on him it just looks…_cute._

"…I guess you can come." My voice is so low but they heard.

"My My, what a charmer you have Ritsu!" mother winks at me "You sure know how to pick them!"

Ack!

Flailing, I squeak out a protest "I-it's not like that! W-we're just friends!"

Being laughed at is so embarrassing; I hide my face under the sheets knowing I broke the world's record of turning the darkest shade of red.

"It's ok" father laughs "He seems better than that man earlier."

Oh— that stings dad…that stings badly.

"He isn't all that bad" whispering, not that they can hear "Or…at least at first."


	12. ORDER FROM THE BOSS!

**So back from that hyper coffee incident (will not apologize0_0) with a new chapter!**

**I will not lie to you guys. In the end of this chapter you all will probable hate me:)**

**Oh well, 2 povs people; I shall name the order:D**

**1; Takano (cause I said so 0.o) also he shall be remembering something special, so look for the **_ITALICS. _**Got it?**

**2; YUKINA *SPOILER* he will be how to say… 'Affectionate' a bit in this one *wink* no lemon people (too soon for that) but he does take a chance!**

**3; back to Takano -_-**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

**129 calls**

**358 sent messages**

And still no reply!

Pick up the god damn phone Onodera! I don't care what you say I don't want us to end!

**132 calls**

**361 sent messages**

Urgh!

Please…I'm sorry… "I can't lose you again."

**140 calls**

**372 sent messages **

Che!

As hard as I can, I threw my cell at the walls breaking it to pieces and ran a hand through my hair.

Two whole days since my blow up and still no uke.

He never came to his apartment, won't answer any my calls or messages and stupid bastard Isaka ordered me to keep my distance. He went as far as to send me home for the whole week!

Tsk.

At least I know while I'm gone Hatori's the one in charge. At least he is reliable.

Needing something to distract me, I turned on my radio and grabbed my pack of cigarettes, inhaling the wonderful relaxing substance.

But then that moment had to be disturbed.

_"Just give me a reason"_

Was playing stirring memories that made me scowl.

Why that song dammit?! Out of every fucking song, society had to play that one!

A small smile plastered itself on my lips remembering when the song first came out.

When I first heard it, it reminded me so much of me and Ritsu and when we had to go with our coworkers drinking, we sang this. (CORRECTION: when they went, he **FORCED** Ritsu to sing the song with him). He has a powerful sweet force too so many thought he WAS a girl.

_It was a karaoke night and I wanted Ritsu and me to sing the new song so badly but he kept say no. He was still angry from the fight we had earlier. So when he wasn't paying attention, I pushed him hard enough he fell onto the center stage with a mic and played the song before he had the chance to run off the stage. _

_Standing there, ready to die, I decided to quiet embarrassing him and walked up with my mic signaling for him to look at the scene on the side and read the words._

_His voice was so perfect and went in turn with music. Like the most beautiful melody anyone has ever heard. I didn't know he could sing like that but was happy to find out._

_He began like; _

_(Right from the start, you were a thief_

_You stole my heart and_

_I your willing victim _

_I let you see the parts of me_

_That weren't all that pretty)_

_A blush grew enormously on that cute heart face of his and I couldn't help but smile and grab his free hand. Yeah people stared but they looked more captivated than disgusted._

_(And with every touch you fixed them_

_Now you've been talking in your sleep_

_Oh oh_

_Things you never say to ME_

_Oh oh_

_Tell me that you had enough _

_Of our love, our love)_

_Those small hands squeezed mine tighter._

_(Just give me a reason _

_Just a little bit's enough_

_Just a second, we're not broken_

_Just bent we can learn to LOVE again!)_

_The angelic voice became louder and a tad more confident._

_(Oh, it's in the stars_

_It's been written in the scars of our heart_

_We're not broken _

_Just bent and we can learn to love again)_

_Now it was my turn and I looked straight in his eyes and sang for him and only him._

_I'm sorry I don't understand_

_Where all of this is coming from_

_I thought that we were fine_

_(Oh we had everything)_

_Your head is running wild again_

_My dear, WE still have everything_

_And it all in your MIND_

_(Yeah but this is happening)_

_My smile grew as I continued._

_You've been having real bad dreams_

_Oh oh_

_Used to lie so close to me_

_Oh oh_

_There's nothing more than empty sheets_

_Between our love, our love_

_Ooooh our love, our love _

_Our voices picked up (His more powerful) as our duet continued. Heck some people were crying as we continued._

_Just give me a reason_

_Just a little bit's enough_

_Just a second, we're not broken_

_Just bent we can learn to LOVE again!_

_Oh, it's in the stars_

_It's been written in the scars of our heart_

_We're not broken _

_Just bent and we can learn to love again_

_(Oh, tear duct and rusts)_

_I'll fix it for us_

_(We're collecting dusts)_

_But our love's enough_

_Pulling him towards me I embraced him fully._

_You're holding it in._

_(You're pouring a drink.)_

_No, nothing is as bad as it seems!_

_(WE'LL COME CLEAN!)_

_Oh Ritsu…_

_Just give me a reason_

_Just a little bit's enough_

_Just a second, we're not broken_

_Just bent we can learn to LOVE again!_

_Oh, it's in the stars_

_It's been written in the scars of our heart_

_We're not broken _

_Just bent and we can learn to love again (2x)_

_(Ooh, we can learn to love again_

_Ooh, can learn to love again_

_Oh, that we're not broken_

_Just bent and we can learn to love again)_

We've come a long way and I had to fuck it up.

_"Masamune"_

Tsk!

Fuck this and what Isaka ordered; I will see my lover.

Putting on my coat, I hadn't even made it to the door when I heard my lover's voice.

* * *

"You didn't have to come you know."

Ritsu just looks so undeniable cute when he worries!

Awe~

He's pouting now *Giggle* and he doesn't even know it.

"Why are you laughing" because you're so cute!

"I don't have to come yes but I wanted to" and who knows if that psycho of an ex is waiting for you.

"B-but…"

Hm?

Is he really that against me going inside?

"What is it?" asking all innocently and reluctantly he answered.

"My apartment is very messy…" oh "I- I haven't been able to clean it so it really embarrassing."

That cute look again…

Pssh….keh…hahahahahahahahaha!

"I don't mind!" how bad can it be?

See, not that bad.

Unfolded clean clothes were everywhere, papers were scattered on the coffee table and books cover the entire floor.

"I've seen worse." Noticing my 'friend's' unbelieving look I elaborated for him.

"What's worse than this?!"

"With my school and job it gets sort of hard cleaning my own apartment all the time. Sometimes I don't even get to sleep on my own bed haha!"

"Eh? I'm not the only one?!"

So cute!

"Especially with all my art supplies everywhere" I would always clean up before Kisa would come over though.

Kisa…

"Yukina, you ok?"

Waving my hand I protested "I'm fine. I'm fine!"

Looking at me with understanding eyes, Ritsu came up face to face "No you're not."

What the—

Shocking me to the spot, Ritsu, my friend, hugs me.

"You hugged me and let me cry it all out…you should do the same. You never once cried did you?"

Once said, he started rubbing my back soothingly while my tears gathered from those heart filled words and poured on his shoulders when I hugged back.

He knows I was thinking of Kisa san.

No one has ever seen through my mask of smiles.

"Thank you" I whispered though the nick of his neck.

Subconsciously, my grip tightened and before stopping myself (If I could) I kissed his neck earning a little gasp. Happy that Ritsu didn't push me away, I kissed his pale neck again trailing up to his face. Cupping it in my hands, I whispered "Thank you" again brushing my lips on his.

Deepening our kiss, I had to pull away to breathe but went back down to his neck while snaking my arms around his waist. His small hands clenched and unclenched my shirt.

It was a content moment until someone had to rudely knock.

Panting, Ritsu's lips were swollen, so are mine but I don't mind.

The tears in my eyes dried up along with the tears in my heart filling with nothing but warmness and new found love. Like a precious jewel I have found and want to cherish with my whole being.

He stopped me from answering the door when the knocking turned into bangs which became kicks. Pulling away, he walked in the halls to answer it.

* * *

Flustered face, swollen lips, I don't even need to guess what I most likely disturbed but it boils me to think about it.

Don't hurt him again Masamune. Reminding myself but it doesn't stop me from preventing him from closing the door on my face.

"You've been ignoring my calls" doe eyes widen "and my messages. Why?"

Tell me, I command you!

As always he snaps back "Why should I answer you?!"

**"Because I am your lover"** matter of fact

"don't give a damn what you say. I'm not breaking up with you."

"That's good to know now move your foot and leave Takano 'KUN'."

Ke!

"No" I grabbed his neck without meaning to and squeezed pulling him out the apartment.

"You're not leaving" hissing now.

**"THIS IS AN ORDER FROM YOUR BOSS."**


	13. confession

**"THIS IS AN ORDER FROM YOUR BOSS."**

CHE!

Eff this! I'm sick of being soft on you!

By bringing me closer, Takano made it easy for me to kick in his nuts!

"Fuck!" he threw me at my door making my head collide with the knob.

Darn it…

I didn't bother to get up but that doesn't mean I stayed where I was. With a swish of my leg, I made him lose his footing and fall.

Not many people know this (AND IT SHOULD STAY THAT WAY) but I AM NOT as weak as they make me out to be.

When I was younger, my cousin and I had to take kendo lessons. God! How I hated those lessons but it does pay off when I need it. I got sort of rusty but at least I still remember what to do.

I never once used it on Takano before because…well because I just didn't have the heart to hurt him. (Not to mention the prick always messed with my heart and found a damn way to pin me down!) And I didn't want him to fear me like other people did when they found out I wasn't a weakling.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand please.

He was on the ground and I was getting up to rush inside and solitude myself when Takano recovered (unfortunately) from shock and lashed onto my ankle. I fell yelling, hitting my right eye on the knob this time, and got dragged back to the crazy raven.

"You are not going to him" hissing at me, Takano licks my busted eye, and continues his choke hold.

"G-et o-off!" I need air!

"No." Crazy bitch "I want everyone to see that you belong to me and ONLY me!"

Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!

He begins undoing my shirt and I can't keep struggling because of his hold on my windpipe. Damn it! Why does this shit always happen to me?!

Gasping, my eyes start getting heavy "S-st-o-p…" deaf ears…it like talking to a friggin wall! Then again, it was always like this. Me talking to a wall. A wall that never listened and only wanted to toy with me.

Che!

Damn you!

Damn you and your sweet nothings Takano san!

"WHAT DAFUQ YOU DOING ASSHOLE!?"

Hah?!

I opened my eyes when the hold on my neck suddenly let go and who do I see; remember when I said how my cousin and I use to do kendo? Well speak of the devil himself (or demon).

Hiroki Kamijo, my cousin, completely air kicked Takano's head sending him flying far away and coincidentally in the elevator that opened at what I consider perfect timing.

"Onodera san you ok?!" Nowaki's here too!

"I *cough cough* I'm fine"

While he inspects the injuries (thank god for him being a doctor!) Hiroki comes up.

"Is that the lunatic auntie was talking about?"

I nod

"Prick."

Hehe. Hiroki…you never change do you?

He hates when one of our family members are hurt (though he'll never admit it) when he cares for someone, he'll do anything to protect them.

"Jesus brat! Why would you go with him?!" and now he's scolding me.

"Dunno. Guess it's the same reason you and Nowaki got together; polar opposites."

Hiroki rolls his eyes "Brat!"

Ritsu: 1  
Hiroki: 0

Nowaki helps me up and fixes my shirt (THANKS TO TAKANO) and we go in the apartment.

Thank you takano san. Because of your intent of raping and killing me in the halls, I am POSITIVILY MOST DEFINITELY going apartment hunting tomorrow! And boooooy is mother gonna go ape shit when she sees these hand prints on my neck. Thank you, you had made my life easier *sob*.

"Who's this?"

"Huh?"

I grasp realizing I completely forgot about Yukina! He is on the ground rubbing the casted leg.

"I'm so sorry! Are you ok?!"

I'm shocked at how easily my emotions take over me. Because, next thing I know, I am by him on the ground fussing about him. God, I'm turning into mother and auntie!

"It's ok Ritsu!" Yukina pets my head "I heard you yell and tripped trying to go to you. You ok?"

Don't know what took over me when I yelled "YOU IDIOT!" yikes "How can you worry about me when YOU ARE the one with a broken leg!"

Damn! Did not want to yell but…I'm jaded, get over it.

But it doesn't give me the right…either.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to yell but…it's just…"

"Don't" gulp.

I'm afraid to look up. Afraid he hates me now and is glaring at me with cold eyes. Once again, for the tenth hundredth time, I am proven wrong by him.

Yukina's eyes are gentle towards me and are smiling?

"You getting mad and fussing shows me you are starting to feel the same thing for me as I feel for you."

GAH!

"So no more sorry."

It's like, for that moment, we're in a bubble of our own…UNTIL MY COUSIN OF A DEMON COMES IN AND POPS THE BUBBLE LEAVING ME HUMILIATED.

"You must be the brat auntie told us about." He says to Yukina "Thanks for looking out for my cousin."

They bow "Another thing" Hiroki smirks his infamous smirk that sends chills down my spine.  
"You better take good care of Ritsu or else."

Damn it all to America!

I say nothing because if I do say something it will only amuse Hiroki. But that doesn't stop him from smirking wider when my face feels hot as hell!

Blush…why must you betray me?

"S-so *Ahem* what are you and your lover doing here?"

Now he's the one turning red (REVENGE *SMIRK*).

"V-vacation! Mother and auntie thinks it's a great idea for you (and me sadly) to take a family trip."

Family trip "I have been wanting to see everyone again." For sooo long!

I smile to myself, I miss my family.

"Where will we see them?"

"England."

Hah?!

Hold the phone "They're still living there!" I thought they moved back!

"Yes and you best be prepared. The rest of our family wants to have a kendo duel so start practicing!"

Hiroki points at me with full determination in those eyes "You may have been #1 when we were children brat but don't be cocky thinking you still are!"

Always the same "Pride. That's both our problem and, Oh my, is that a wedding ring I see?" Keh heh heh again I say, REVENGE.

"S-shut up! S-so what if I'm h-hitched! Asshole!"

Ahahahahahaha!

"I'm only messing with you Hiroki." I hug this prideful cousin of mine "I'm happy for you and Nowaki, really."

"Get off me punk!"

My, my, still hate being hugged?

He pushes me off and I fall against Yukina's chest.

"Sorry"

Both seme laughs at how we act and Nowaki embraces Hiroki and places a kiss on his tempo. I really do admire them. Polar opposites yet they fit perfectly with each other and understands each other. Maybe I am jealous at what they have?

"We'll be outside and wait for you to pack Onodera san."

"Thanks Nowaki." Hiroki gets dragged away screaming threats at me.

Yup. How I miss my family.

"So you know kendo huh."

Eep!

"Use to" sigh "I'm a bit rusty now. Been…eight years since I actually practiced."

Please don't hate me!

"That's awesome! I always wanted to learn something like that but couldn't. My mother worried I would get hurt badly." He kisses my cheek.

_Ba-bump!_

I never got a chance to talk to Takano like this. Every time we met up, he only wanted to do one thing and one thing only. **Sex**. That's why I always refused to go on dates with him knowing it would lead to _that._ Not to mention I worked hard as hell at work, with little sleep, and wanted to sleep in on my days off.

Yukina actually listens and talks back and it feels so natural! It's not stressful or awkward nor is it any way lustful. Maybe I should date him….

"Yukina…" I want to move forward.

"Yes?"

I swallow the lump in my throat. This is completely out of my character but do your best self! Convey your feelings into words now!

"I can't…" breathe "I can't say I am getting over T-Takano san quickly but I do want to m-move forward…" my cheeks all the way to my ears heat up "D-don't get the wrong idea because h-honestly, I don't see why you or anyone would like a person like me." Another breath.  
"I'm jaded, emotional, self-conscious, awkward, antisocial, negative, depressed, loud at times, short tempered sometimes, stubborn (VERY), prideful, dramatic at times as well, hysterical even, I worry too much, I find it hard to trust others, not use to speaking my feelings out loud, and ugly but, but…."

**_"You're perfect."_**

Ack! "Y-Y-Yukina!" he's showering me with kisses but when he gets to my neck I freak.

"Wait!"

"Ok." Awe…he is complying?

"I have many flaws b-but I DO want to move on…w-with you…if that is ok I mean!"

Kill me now kill me now kill me now kill me now kill me now! God kill me now please!

"Of course that's ok Ritsu!"

I melt in his warm hugs "But…I don't want to rush things…" catch my drift?

"I understand" yes "We'll take things slow" REALLY?! "It's more romantic that way and besides that, I get to know more about you from hobbies to the things you keep in your heart. It's sweet like this."

Letting the breath I was holding in out I say sweetly "Thank you Kou." Embarrassing I know but it can't get worse than this.

"Awwe! Soooooo cute! So cute!" I was wrong. Nowaki's saw everything from the door squealing while… OH. MY. GOD.

Hiroki's laughing up a storm while video tapping us!

"Give me that phone!"

"No! The WHOLE family's gonna see this priceless confession!"

No! Anything but that!

"HIROKIIIIIIIIII!"


	14. bestowed memories and scars

**HELLO PEOPLE READING THIS STORY!**

**JUST A QUICK WARNING OK? AS YOU'VE BEEN READING AND CAN SEE (HOPEFULLY) HOW TAKANO IS WAAAAAAAAAAY THE WHOLE BEING BRUTAL AND ABUSIVE THING. WELL~~~**  
**I WASN'T GOING TO MAKE HIM THAT MUCH OF A DOUCHE BUT I CHANGED MY MIND NOW SO THIS IS A CHAPTER ON HOW THEY WERE AFTER RITSU FINALLY CONFESSED!**  
**IT WILL INVOLVE VIOLENCE PEOPLE SO *RUNS AWAAAAAAAY!***

**ALSO THIS WILL BE MY (NARRATOR SORRY) POV SO IF I SUCK AT BEING A NARRATOR, FORGIVE ME.**

* * *

_**'****Loving someone is looking past all their flaws and seeing only beauty underneath.'**_

* * *

_For a certain brunet that practically screamed 'innocent mind' that's what he saw in the demon chief of editor. A whole year of denying and denying his love for his boss, everything just seemed to crash down. Those once strong barriers finally broke leaving nothing but that same overflowing cup of emotions from high school. Making him admit not, only to Takano, but himself as well that he loved the man with all his heart, mind, and soul and always had._

_Now don't go and assume "KYAAA! Sparkly lovey dovey but sex all around people!" because reality is just like Mother Nature! _

_A whore I tell you! _

_She starts out all kind and surgery for the first two maybe three (if we're lucky) months. Then turns friggin cold on us and send us through some serious crap we don't even deserve! What the heck man?! Just give us our happy ever after and let us be!_

_Ahem…sorry about that; back to our main point here._

_Like I said in my own way; Things were going rather smoothly for our cute couple. For the most beginning months that is. Nothing really changed at first. Same routine; go to work, get dead tired, go home, and Takano dragging poor Ritsu to HIS apartment, making Ritsu unable to walk the next day/days._

_But then something happened._

_Takano was becoming rather…COLD._

_Usually his words were only meant to tease his sweet lil lover but now it was becoming more abusive and hurtful. Ritsu questioned a couple (ok MORE THAN A COUPLE) times if what Takano said about him was true._

_Was he really that unattractive?_

_Slow?_

_Awkward?_

_Mean?_

_Ugly?_

_What was he doing wrong that made Takano so angry at him?!_

_But being the stubborn and proud person he is; Ritsu refused to take any more hurtful words and began fighting back! The fights got so bad that Onodera had to lock his doors and hide in his closet until Takano gave up banging on the door and went out to drink._

_In the morning he was safe (Thank god for pedestrians!) but felt the enormous amount of guilt for pushing Takano away again._

_It's not like he can help it._

_Ritsu truly did want to know what was wrong and fix it. He wanted to make Takano happy, even said 'I love you' more than FIVE times to Takano only to receive an icy cold shoulder. _

_Then one night, after a fight and Takano storming off, Ritsu went back to his apartment and di the most stupidest thing. _

_He forgot to lock his door-_-_

_Fatigued from the work load and lack of nutrition he crashed on the crouch. Sleeping quite peacefully until a noise woke him in the middle of the night._

_The door was ajar and that was enough to scare the crap out of him but what happened next was more frightening!_

_He went and closed the door. Making sure it was locked this time but before he can turn and walk back to his comfy couch, big strong hands pinned him to the wall._

_"WHAT THE HELL!?" panic flooded his mind as he tried fighting his captor._

_Said captor pinned him hard tying the brunet's hands tightly then harshly throwing him down. Not knowing what the hell was going on besides the pain on his side. Ritsu looked up and eyes widened when he got a good look at his attacker's face._

_"Takano san?!"_

_Takano kicked Ritsu square in the face sending him flying further in the apartment. He pinned his lil lover's hands above his head then began tearing his clothes off. Alcohol could be smelled from the man. It happened again thought our cute brunet. _

_'He's drunk again.'_

_This was the main reason he locked his doors and hid whenever Takano was angry or worse drunk!  
As it turns out, Takano Masamune, great demon chief of editor, and one hell of a hottie was a furious drunk. A drunk that was into MAJOR __**S&M**__ stuff which Ritsu found out sadly when the big fights began._

_The good thing is Takano never came back most times when he was drunk but when he did it always involved bruises or cuts or BOTH!_

_The raven devil spread ritsu's legs apart that it was ripping him in two. With no warning, he thrusted himself hard in his lover's small form making him bleed and cry out in agony. _

_Begging takano to stop, Ritsu was replied only with getting shouted at, insulted, and slapped._

_'When will this be over?' _

_No answer came only more pain._

_When finished, takano (still in drunken mode) kicked Ritsu to the side like dirt and walked to the baths to clean himself up. He then left the unconscious brunet on the floor and went back to his apartment to sleep peacefully. _

_Not even a sorry…_

* * *

Huh?

A…dream?

No. I looked up at the ceiling of the guest room of my cousin's and his husband's house. That dream was no dream indeed but a part of me.

A memory.

That was when Takano was getting drunk more often. I guess when he wasn't out fucking Kisa he came to me and did that shit.

Blood boiled the more I pondered on the memories.

No use thinking of it now. I'm moving on with a nice person that isn't like HIM at all. Going to see my family tomorrow.

Little by little I am breaking my chains to you Takano along with the help of Yukina.

_**I just wish these memories will end along with the scars you bestowed on me.**_


	15. how did this happen!

**OK!  
So I don't really do this but since I feel the need to give you more than just a "THANK YOU" I will reply to your reviews on here. In this chapter. …:D**

**Anyways let's get started ok!**

**PINK FROZEN ROSE: I am glad you were happy for the update:D **

**GUEST #1: You shot me?! Really?! *looks at shoulder* well you got me good I give you that:) and I know I forgot to put Yukina in. I was debating to but decided not to sadly:( but I am happy you understand WHY I made the chapter:) and I hope you enjoy this chapter:D**

**MIZOOKIE: Yeah~ I manage to shock Mizookie chan! **

**FOREVER-FANGIRLING 1997: I had to make Takano sadistic and mean for this story. I am sorry! *Hides behind desk* and yes they will go to England! Maybe I SHOULD put you in with them *evil grin* Muwahahahahaha! *ahem* sorry bout that.**

**KEEN95: Thanks! I'm glad you and others aren't bashing me for making Takano cruel to poor Ritsu:D**

**KAORI AKIRA: Akira chan, my choice of words on love (as I can see) must have confused you:D my fault if you mistook my words. Yes we do have to see both sides (beautiful and ugly) of our lovers but when I said "Loving someone is looking past all their flaws and seeing only beauty underneath." I meant that even when we see their bad side we can still love them never the less and accept them for who they are:D but you are also right for Ritsu thinking like that and not leaving Takano sooner:D but that's why we all love Ritsu! He is sooooo dense! **

**GUEST #2: Yes I am a Mexican:D A VEEEERY happy Mexican thanks to all of you!**

**YUKI: Thanks *blush* I like drama (not over dramatic but just enough) stories so I try:)**

**GUEST #3: *Giggle* oh my, wanting to beat Takano senseless huh:3 my friend wants to too but she took it out on me when I first started this story:D said I am mean to my characters:3**

**ARROWINABOW777: Haha your welcome:3 I'm just glad bringing in Hiroki and Nowaki was a good idea:)**

**KAGE NO HATO: *GIGGLE* thanks I love writing stories that others enjoy. It's like a way for me to escape reality haha and I do try making the characters fit the plot:D I never really thought of making a Mino and Yuu story before. they aren't really my favorite so I mostly use them as minors:3 maybe one day I shall make a story for them but only time and inspiration will tell:3 thanks for not being mad at how mean I made Takano:) I like him too but he does tend to get possessive haha. **

**I hope this helps:D**

**For all of you, here's a mental hug and panda plushie!  
(^_^)**

**I WILL NOT REMOVE THE NAMES ABOVE BECAUSE I AT LEAST WANT TO THANK MOST OF MY READERS FROM MY OLD ACCOUNT AND APOLOGIZE ONCE MORE FOR GOOGLE SKEWING ME OVER:3 **

**ENJOY~**

* * *

"How the heck did this happen?!"

**FLASH BACK~**

Woke up from those hellish memories, showered, got dressed, ate or tried to anyways then pack for the flight.

While waiting for Yukina to come, me and Hiroki began arguing over books. It's was his fault! He tried taking my Ellen Hopkins book called "Tilt". It's one of my most favorite books and I'll be damned if I let ANYONE take it!

During our quarrel meaning hid foot to my face as I hold the book for dear life the doorbell rang. Nowaki answered it and comes back with Yukina behind him. Staring at us he chuckles. I don't know about Hiroki but I myself am mortified!

Damn it all!

Why do we act like children in front of him? Well at least Hiroki let go of my book.

"H-hi Yukina" stop stuttering baka!

Before I had the chance to get up from the floor and greet him something (or someone) catches me off guard making me fall back.

My mother.

She came out behind Yukina and practically tackled me to the ground opening my shirt and screams in a full blood rage "What the hell did that man do!"

Obviously she sees the bruises and hand prints (Not to mention the cut on my eyebrow) so there's no need to ask or shout!

"You have a lot of explaining to do when we get to England young man! And don't you dare try getting away; it's the least you can to for making your father and me worry."

Gulp.

S-she has a point but "Do I have to say it in front of everyone?" Please say no! Please say no! Please say no!

"Yes!" darn it!

"Fine…"

We all left to the airport with me sulking from embarrassment and shame and Hiroki laughing all the way. Darn you cousin! Hope you develop asthma from all your laughing! If that's even possible:/

Yukina kept comforting me to no use since mother and Nowaki kept squealing and going "awe!" or "Sooooo cute!" making me a mutated tomato from toe to ear.

Yukina and I sat next to each other on the plane.

Mom and dad behind us and Nowaki and Hiroki by us.

"Where are aunt and uncle?" I asked him "I thought they were coming as well."

Hiroki grunts "They're there already."

"oh."

So everything was fine then a certain someone came on walking eerily towards us making my heart pound and jump out my rib cage!

"T-Takano san?!"

"What the hell are YOU doing here?" venom seethed out of his every word.

"I believe that is MY question for YOU!" I retorted just as heatedly.

Stalker!

Yukina hand snake around my waist gently but protectively and pull me towards him. I can feel my family equally tense with murder written all over.

"I'm here for work."

"Hah?!"

Following him, Kisa comes along with Mino and… "Isaka?!"

"Yoo hoo~ so you're going to England as well Onodera Kun?"

"Visiting family there and you?"

"A company there wants to sell our manga and needs translator so here we are!"

"I understand then…" mother however doesn't.

"How can you let that maniac near my child?!" er "Look what he has done!"

Isaka smiles apologetically "I'm sorry but we need Takano Kun Mrs. Onodera Sama."

She huffs "Just keep him away from my baby!"

God…why?

They sat in front of us.

Awkward—

"It's ok." Yukina kissed my tempo in some sort of assurance making my heart flutter but drop when Kisa and Takano clearly saw.

"E-eto…Where's Hatori san?" I turned away from basically everyone.

I swear Kisa was looking at me with a 'back- the- hell- off- my- man' look but the voice was as cheerful as ever.

"Hatori- chan had to stay behind because of his lover."

"I see." Um…

"So are you and Yukina dating now?" crap!

**END OF FLASH BACK~**

What do I tell him; his nails are digging in the seat!

"W-well…"  
"Yo brat!" we turn to see a glaring Hiroki "That is NONE Of YOUR BUSINESS."

"Oh?" Kisa's killing aura?! "I believe it is."

"How the heck did this happen?!"

We all are in the air bickering at each other.

Me vs Takano

My parents vs Takano

Yukina trying to calm me but throwing threats back at Takano!

Hiroki vs Kisa with a poor Nowaki holding Hiroki back from jumping chairs and beating up Kisa. He somehow got books from thin air and is throwing them at Kisa.

Isaka and Mino are smiling watching us.

The flight attendants are avoiding us.

All this basically makes me want to puke.

* * *

**ELSE WHERE~**

Damn I missed the flight!

Cussing under my breath I booked another flight to England causing me to leave at midnight. Great. Now jet leg will be worse when I get there.

"Yo!" and here comes the main reason why I missed my flight!

"What you want asshole?!"

Damn Kirishima! This is all YOUR fault! Bastard!

"Whoa! Calm down." Not realizing fast enough to back away he kissed me. In public!  
"I just wanted to kiss you goodbye~"

"Idiot…tell Hiyori I said goodbye and I'll bring her a souvenir."

He chuckles "Yes my love."

Grr…. "STOP SAYING CHEESY SHIT IN PUBLIC YOU ASSHOLE!"

**I wasn't gonna put Yokozawa in here originally (I don't like him) but someone needs to hold Takano back when the man gets crazy! Also…I was thinking (Fighting with my personalities actually) if I should steer this towards MPREG. I really REALLY want to write a male pregnancy story with the symptoms and everything. Well I did in my first fanfic but it only mentioned pregnancy it didn't show/explain things. And wasn't really lovey dovey but my point is I want to make this story one but I don't know.**

**What do you guys think?**

**Til next time~**


	16. teaser

**SHORT PREVIEW PEOPLE!**

**JUST POSTING THIS AS A TEASE MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_**"****Yes Onodera tell them." He said smiling evilly at the crying brunet beside me.  
"Tell them how I would drill into you and make you cry out while clinging desperately to me. How you would tell me to be gentle. How you moaned loudly when I didn't. Yes. Tell them everything."**_

_**Seething with anger, I got up and walked to the damn man. I hate men like him. So abusive. Controlling. Hateful. I hate them all!**_

_**Looking up at him I slapped him hard for everyone to hear the smack!**_

_**"****Why you…!" he clenched my neck.**_

_**"****Masamune!" a voice rang out loud for all to hear "Let her go."**_

* * *

**yea~**

**now that all these lovey chapters are reposted...**

**I shall begin to continue this story along with OSOTR!**

**so please(sorry for asking again)**

**REVIEW!**

**and **

**THANK YOU ALL!**

**:3**


	17. side chapter

**New pov people! this is short i know but be patient please! just wanted to introduce HER in this story. hope you like herXD**

**enjoy~**

Standing there with a sign in my hands; I waited for the right plane to land. Man I hate fetching people! My feet hurt and I want to go back home and watch anime! Darn you Ritsu, I swear, if you are not on this plane I am going to kill you in kendo.

Thank god!

The plane is finally landing.

Waiting for them to come off some assholes walk in front of me! hello~ I know you dicks can see me. I am not THAT short! Urg! Guys are assholes.

Pushing them away I see Ritsu and Hiroki along with auntie and uncle (and Hiroki's lover.) but oh my, this must be an interesting story.

All of them are screaming and fighting with this other group and Ritsu is being tackled by some guy bigger than him. The raven haired man if carrying him like a sack and some blonde prince guy with a broken leg is pulling ritsu's arms.

Is this some yaoi shit I've been missing?!

If so I want to know WHICH man is Ritsu's boyfriend and what type of 'FUN STUFF' they've been doing.

Muwahahahahahahahahahahaha this will be fun.

"Ritsu!" I ran up to them glomping all three making them fall to the ground. Man "You look like shit Ritsu." His eye has a cut above it and a bruise on his head.

"Gee thanks" he retorts then scrams away from the raven who gets tackled by some smiling freak named Mino and another guy I think named Isaka?

"Can we go now?" Ritsu and them asks (more like orders) me.

"So much for a 'hey how you been?' geez."

"Sorry, we'll do that later promise but can we get out here now?"

"Fine." the sooner the better.

"Onodera!" the raven calls being pulled away "Onodera! Don't you fucking leave me! Little bitch! I'M THE ONLY ONE YOU SHOULD LOVE! REMEMBER THAT YOU SLUT"

*SNAP*

The fuck does that asshole think he is calling MY FAMILY MEMBER A SLUT!

We the Onoderas are faithful people! Loyal to the ones we cherish!

God men are assholes!

**Hahaha tell me what you think of her:3 **

**the next ch will still be her pov mixed with the others so look forward to it!**

**Her name, you will just have to find out next time:3**

**REVIEW AND HELP ME GET BACK!**

**OR ELSE I'LL DROP THIS STORY AND LIVE IN MY EMO CORNER WITH NOTHING BUT A BROKEN RITSU AND HURT YUKINA WITH ME BECAUSE THEY GOT NO REVIEWS AND COULDN'T FIND THEIR HAPPY EVER AFTER AND HAD TO BE STUCK RUNNING IN CIRCLES.**

**0_0**

**THEY DEPEND ON YOU.**

**O_O**

**YOU ARE THE ONES THAT GIVE THEM LIFE.**

**bye bye~**


	18. rants plans and curiousness

**Muwahahahahahahahahaha**

**we are nearing the teaser of this story (please go to ch 16 if don't get what i'm talking about) and like i said HERE IS THE NEW CHARACTER LOL:D**

**Oh and here is the order of povs lol**

**1: Yukina~ *sparkles***

**2: Takano...:/ I STILL LOVE HIM XD *gets hit in the head* QAQ douche!**

**3: Kisa *Huggles* he's such so emo in the anime i can't hate him neitherXD **

**4: RITSU! *GLOMPS* **

**5: (wow FIVE povs! O.O) SURPRISE! (One of my character!) **

**hope you grow to like her as well lolXD**

**enjoy~**

* * *

"THAT FUCKER DID WHAT!"

She fumed on turning redder than a demon on rampage. "And he has the nerves to claim you! God men are assholes! HOPE THEY ALL DIE!"

Um…

Really scary…

"And YOU!" Eeep! Pointing a finger at me, her blood red irises glare drilling holes into my soul.  
"You could've done a better job at protecting my cousin you useless slave!"

She scares me!

Her bunny hat ears flopped in her face making her huff and take it off revealing pure white hair.

"Sinful come here." Ritsu's mother calls helping her fix the hat.

"What was that?" I asked particularly no one but jumped when answered anyways.

"That is my cousin. Don't mind her dislike for men. It runs deep that's all." Ritsu comes up by me smiling slightly "Since she was little she never got along with boys or other girls so she dislikes others. She's not really hateful though just short tempered."

"Hates men? Why?"

I regret the moment I ask.

Ritsu's face goes sad and he looks at the child who is laughing at her teasing Hiroki.

"Did you know she is PART albino. That's why she has red eyes."

"Really?" this is random…

"Yeah but…she was never meant to be born."

HUH?!

He sighs looking down at the floor.

"Her mother, my aunt, got raped by some foreigner 14 years ago and she got pregnant. The man was never caught and nine month later my cousin was born. They were considering aborting her at one point but my aunt (being the kind women she is) opposed it.

"Oh…" damn "I'm sorry."

Shaking his head, he smiles once more.

"It's fine. When she was born my uncle got to name her."

"What name?" she never told me.

"Well since she came out with red eyes he named her sinful hehe~"

Sinful… "Isn't that cruel?"

Chuckling "It seems like it but the reason he did that was because when she came out and he held her for the first time she kicked and screamed so much her named her that for revenge."

Oh!

I laugh at that also "She does seem a bit feisty haha."

"Hmp they both love her like their real child and treasure her. To us, she's a full Onodera."

The proud look on his face confirms the family love he has for her too.

"She helped me a lot when I came over here to study. I had to watch her constantly. If it wasn't for her keeping me busy all those years I might have went crazy."

"HEY YOU!" she stomps to me "You like anime?"

* * *

"Are we there yet?" Kisa whines to Isaka about the hotel being too fucking far for his liking.

Jesus!

Why did I cheat on my cute adorable uke with THIS diva?!

I know I love him…and I know what terrible things I did to him.

But I can't let him go.

I'm lost without him.

Che!

Enough with this useless talk!

I'll win him and prove I can get better and treasure him more than anyone ever could!

I'll show him over and over again that he is nothing but useless with me.

My brain goes into overdrive thinking one plane after another on getting Ritsu back and Yukina fag out of the way.

* * *

Planning is exactly what I'm doing as I whine to Isaka.

So many ideas, so many ways, and methods to dispose of Ricchan.

We can go with slow and painful or agonizingly slow so he can suffer for eternity and humongous pain. So many options only one to choose. I want him to suffer so I'll go with the latter.

When Yukina kissed HIM I swear I was going to break the seat with my claws!

You don't belong to him Yukina!

It's me you belong to!

ME you need!

Ending my inner rants we come to the hotel. It's big and homey with some traditional Japanese design. Do other japs live here?

"The owners originate from Japan so communicating isn't a problem" Isaka smiles.

Oh how I long to rip off his face one day.

"Sweet!" I fake childish. Maybe I'll find some lonely sucker to fuck in here. Smirking I knock.

Oh my mother fucking god.

God ha!

* * *

Why won't you give me a rest god!?

Urg!

Try to move forward and the past comes and bites me harder in the but!

"Why are you here?" I swear Takano IS stalking me!

But the latter doesn't reply; Isaka does.

"Oh! Onodera san" he's sweat dropping from my mother's cold glare "You're staying here as well?"

"my aunt and uncle owns the place"

"Oh…I see…um" weird "This is the hotel we booked at…um…should we go somewhere else?"

Sighing "No." poor Isaka; caught in a war that doesn't involve him. "Other hotels are booked and don't speak Japanese. It's ok for you to stay here."

Not making eye contact, I walk away to Yukina with our luggage.

* * *

Along with Tia I glare at the intruders at the door.

ESPECIALLY THE ONE THAT CALLED RITSU BRO A SLUT!

"Why the hell are YOU here!" I say to him who glares back.

"Reservations twerp." Growling.

Challenging me eh!

Tsk!

"Don't you dare talk or touch my cousin ever again. Understand prick."

"Che! Says the white chick!"

***snap snap snap snap snap snap* **

White…. "BITCH I EAT PEOPLE!"

Before I have the pleasure of pouncing on him and clawing his eyes out; Hiroki's husband catches me in mid jump and carries me away.

Flipping the bastard off I yell "Heave my words dumbass! My name is sinful! Your death god! Remember this isn't over! ISN'T OVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!"as I get carried down the hall.

"Urg he pisses me off! Who is he and why did he call Ritsu bro a bitch!"

"I know I know" Hiroki bro doesn't scold me to 'shut the fuck up or die' and answers my question.  
"His name is Takano Masamune; Ritsu's ex."

Processing….. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!"

"Shut up you brat before Nowaki goes deaf! And me!"

"Sorry" I say to Nowaki because Nowaki is nice. Not a douche like others.  
"Hiroki, tell me everything that happened between them."

Hiroki bro shakes his head "I don't know what happened. I only found out by auntie but even she doesn't know the full story. Ritsu's going to explain it later."

Pouting I hang my head on Nowaki's shoulder allowing him to carry me to my room.  
"Fine but I'm still curious."

* * *

**see like i said!  
**

**I really do hope you grow to like sinful lolXD**

**she is one of the main characters in my original book that i have wrote.**

**one day i hope to get it published 0_0**

**daydreams~ **

***snaps out of it* **

**AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE AWESOME LOVELY REVIEWS FOR LAST CHAPTER!**

***HUGGLES* **

**I WAS GOING A BIT EMO WHEN I HAD TO MAKE THIS NEW ACCOUNT PLUS TESTS FROM SCHOOL AND ADD FAMILY DRAMA ETC. **

**BUT HOPEFULLY I'LL GET BACK ON MY FEET REFRESHED AND READY FOR THE IMPOSSIBLE;)**

**With the help of all of you of course *BOWS* NEXT CHAPTER I SHALL PUT ALL YOU NAMES IN OK!**

**lol so review ne?**

**neko candy~**


	19. reunion

**Man I'm starting to think I'm beginning to spoil all of you lol:D**

**List of povs here~**

**1; Ritsu *wink wink***

**2; Sinful (finally the teaser part comes!) phew!**

**3; He's back~ Yokozawa!**

**Enjoy~**

_Pick up the pieces_

* * *

Day one of visiting my family and its glum.

Why oh why can't my past let me be?

Already drained mentally and psychically…let's just say a knife seems pretty promising right now ok.

"Ritsu."

Yukina calls as we enter the suite but being too numb at the moment I don't answer. I put my luggage down then go to sit on the bed with my head in my hands.

"Ritsu?"

"Huh?" I look up seeing Yukina do the same as me. He sits beside me, worry layered in his beautiful face. "You ok?" he caresses my check with his dumb.

"I'm fine! Just fine!" forcing a smile I laugh apologetically "I'm sorry for not sending them away Yukina." His hands go to my waist pulling me into his lap.

"It's fine" he coos "I'm just worried for you, you know."

He kisses my eye to my cheek then my lips down to my neck; where he sucks lightly leaving a soft hickey in its place.

Mewing, I shudder clenching and unclenching his shirt in my hands.

"Ritsu" he breathes making me moan "Let's go on a date tomorrow."

"A d-date—ah!"

Oh god…

I can't think when you fondle my chest like this!

How do you even know where my sensitive places are?!

"Y-Yuki- ah!- na…" I feel his boner against mine getting harder with each passing second.

"Ah…sorry" blushing, Yukina moves away "I was losing myself there. I'm sorry."

No.

Missing his warmth I move towards him and kiss him softly.

"It's ok" sitting on him again "I-I trust you." Man. When was the last time I said my mind so freely out loud?

Kissing me once again, he pushes me on my back, our tongue battling fiercely.

Like snakes shedding skin, we shed our shirts only breaking our kiss when needing air.

"You are so beautiful Ritsu." Yukina's breath is hot against my ear lobe.

"Nnn…" he is already dry humping me with our pants still on making sensual friction more nerve wracking. "Ah…AH!" the thrusts gets faster making us harder than before.

Our voices get louder when he begins unbuckling my belt, pulling them down a bit by bit.

Losing myself, I kiss his strong chest, licking when…

"Ritsu niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiii!"

(!)

Sinful burst in freezing us on the spot.

"Gah!" speechless I pull away at once (habit) and hide under the shelter of the blankets.

My god!

I can't believe she seen us doing—gah!

"Heh."

Huh?

"Pssssh…Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahah! Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha…haaah…ahaha! Oh my god!" Sinful's on the floor having a laugh attack with a nosebleed.

"I wish I had a camera hehehehehahahahahaha! Next time I know!"

Composing herself (and wiping off the blood from her nose) she beams "Mama said lunch is ready and to come and eat you two rabbits! Don't skip to desert just yet!" then she leaves us alone again with me all red, wanting to sink away.

"Haah" Yukina sighs handing me my shirt "Guess we should go?"

Still stunned I manage a meek "Y-yes."

Buttoning my shirt Yukina calls "Hey Ritsu."

"Yes?"

***Smooch*** gah!

_"I love you."_ Planting one last kiss, it's so sincere that all my worries melt away in a snap.

Do I say it back?

Can I work up the courage to say it back?

"When you are ready…" I go back to him "Say it; I will wait for now."

Blushing with my heart jumping a mile per hour (or more!) I hold his gaze. Searching. Looking for a lie. Any dishonesty in those soft eyes of warmth.

There is none.

* * *

I can't believe I've seen that!

OMG!

Talk about perfect timing!

Crying from laughing too much, I go to the dinner table were not soon after Ritsu bro and his boyfriend follows.

Everyone is smiling.

Mom, dad, aunt and uncle Kamijo (Which is rare for uncle since he is strict as hell)!

Everyone is having a grand reunion but there is tension in the air. Mom and dad plus auntie fuss over ritsu's injury. Asking how he got them and what happened.

Aunt Onodera is ranting about his ex-boyfriend dragging him out the hospital mercilessly.

"He had the nerves to hurt my baby!" she wails then demands Ritsu "Tell us how you got involved with a scum like him!"

Wow such hate.

Guess I know now what side of the family I get my temper from.

"W-well…" he begins squirming in his seat "We m-met in high school when I first started…that where I fell in love with him."

He blushes and looks at his hands which are griping a bit too tightly with themselves.

Glaring mama asks "Did he…" she left it unfinished. Not that she needs to say it. We all are waiting for that answer and at what age?

"Y-yes."

Let's see high school right? Freshman year so Ritsu bro was…god!

15!

"15 and lost your virginity Ritsu!" mom and both my aunts attacks him mercilessly.

"No wonder you became depressed and asked to study abroad!" aunt Rika turns purple.

"When did he become abusive?" Mama questions with a look of serious concern as if she recollecting something way back.

Should I be concern?

Was papa abusive?

Nah.

"He wasn't abusive…at first." He tells us about how the guy turned out to be boss when he started working for shojo.

How his high school sweet heart claimed to make him love him again.

And when he did fall for him again, months past for of happiness that turned to shit all too soon.

Ritsu told us about the remarks but refused to tell about the abuse without tearing a bit.

"Tell us" all women demanded making poor Ritsu cave.

Then (my god) did things go from tense to complete hell when the man of talk comes creeping in with the rest of his goons.

"Yes Onodera tell them." He said smiling evilly at the crying brunet beside me.

"Tell them how I would drill into you and make you cry out while clinging desperately to me. How you would tell me to be gentle. How you moaned loudly when I didn't. Yes. Tell them everything."

Seething with anger, I got up and walked to the damn man. I hate men like him. So abusive. Controlling. Hateful. I hate them all!

Looking up at him I slapped him hard for everyone to hear the smack!

"Why you…!" he clenched my neck.

**"Masamune!"** a voice rang out loud for all to hear **"Let her go."**

Doing what he is told, the big gorilla lets go of my neck growling; daring me to go up against him again.

Which I will gradually take up if it means KICKING HIS ASS!

"I'm sorry for his behavior." The voice says coming in.

A man as tall as the baboon with blue eyes and suit bows to me "He's not in his right mind at the moment little kid."

Little…. "Then put him on a leash like the dog he is." And I'm NOT little!

God why must everyone point out my height?!

"I'll be sure to." He growls at me too.

Oh?

More rivals…_PERFECT._

* * *

I finally make it to the damn hotel and what do I find.

My best friend/ex-lover choke-holding a child!

Damn it all!

I'm tired.

I'm cranky.

Plus having major jet leg.

Apologizing for his ass the girl has the balls to say something snarky to me!

Fuck it I don't want to deal with this!

I give a reply back (ok more like growled a reply back) and pulled Masamune with me to my room before the idiot cause any more trouble.

I know him and Onodera broke up and that due to Masamune's behavior.

But _WHY_ did they break up?

Did that twerp Onodera do something like cheat on Masamune?

If he did he is in for a world of hurt.

* * *

**Now names~**

**Thanks to all of you that have been very patient for me!**

**it really means a lot and with everything going on your reviews lift my spirit enormously!**

**JunjoSekai-ichi **

**pink frozen rose**

**Dokindokindesu**

**sparkysilverglass**

**Mya **

**botra manga**

**forever-fangirling1997**

**nightmare1818**

**kashi29 **

**Kaori Akira**

**Kitkat3195 **

**Guest**

**Manga Ren **

**THANK YOU ALL AND I WISH THIS CHAPTER COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER BUT DON'T WORRY!**

**ANYONE UP FOR A RITSU X YUKINA DATE?**

**X3**


	20. trust

_**"****Thank you for being born"…**_**wow, never heard that before in my life since I was born lolXD**

**THANK YOU MUFFIN FOR SENDING THAT REVIEWX3**

**I was actually getting depressed (emotional I know) and starting to believe this story was a drag.**

**I hope I am wrong and that this makes up for my lazy butt lately:3**

**So…enjoy~**

* * *

Urgh! That prick pisses me off more than anything and it's hard to get me mad! I clench my fists so tight, digging the nails in when the bastard of a man was talking I bled a bit. I think my hands are bruised now. Looking at them I am proved correct.

Stop humiliating the poor guy! With someone as sensitive as Ritsu, he's gonna drive my lover towards suicide again!

If Yokozawa san didn't come when he did I would have been arrested for murder with no regret.

Sniffling, Ritsu looks down hiding away from his family, especially his aunt's, stares.

"Ritsu honey" the aunt calls her jaw tight making the brunet curl in on himself shaking for reasons I have yet to find out "What the man said…was that the kind abuse he…" realization punched me in the gut like a lil prick.

_"Yes Onodera tell them." He said smiling evilly at the crying brunet beside me._

_"Tell them how I would drill into you and make you cry out while clinging desperately to me. How you would tell me to be gentle. How you moaned loudly when I didn't. Yes. Tell them everything."_

The things the shit sneered.

God why haven't I thought of that?! Sure I got the feeling Takano use to hit and beat Ritsu and I know he was verbally abusive but rape. Oh kami Sama give me the strength to take all ritsu's pain away, even a lil.

Not thinking, I try to take him in my arms but he flinches, not being able to form a sentence as he runs out the dinner room.

Damn!

What in Kami's name have you done you bastard.

Going after him I rush to our room and open the door. "Ritsu?" he's not here "Where are you?" please don't be hurting yourself! Apprehension kicks in my blood making me picture numerous horrible scenarios. "Oh no!" looking in all the rooms thoroughly I still can't find him!

Calm down Kou, I chant, where would he be if not here? Think….is that sniffling I hear?

Looking at the wardrobe closet (A/N sorry I forgot what you call them TT_TT) I hear soft crying flowing out like a sad lullaby.

"Hey…" I try opening it to no avail. He locked it, locking everyone out including me. "Can you open please?"

No reply.

"Please." Desperation kicks in my voice. I can't help it, he's in here suffering alone! Please love; let ME shoulder your burden.

"I just want to be…alone right now."

Ke… "Ritsu…haah…why can't you talk to me about this? Don't you want someone there in the dark with you?" _**don't you trust me?**_ I lean my head on the door crying for him and what he had to go through. Silence swirls around us making me fear if he rather we break up than share his pain with me.

"I'm not use to it…" his voice is strain from crying "I'm not use to sharing my problems. I'm so awkward I can't even talk to my family of what goes on in my life without screwing things up. It's easier to deal with things on my own…I'm used to it actually." The last part I had to strain to hear but it made the dots connect in my mind.

"You were always alone huh? Relying on yourself, taking everything life throws without anyone to catch you if you fall. Just to keep yourself sane." God, why did such a beautiful person both inside and out have to suffer as long as he did?

Finding the strength in me, I pull apart the doors keeping me from my soul mate. Who was hugging his knees to his chest with tears dripping from his beautiful flustered face. "But don't you know a man goes nuts when he's alone in the dark for so long. Don't you believe it's time to change that?"

Eyes staring at me like I told him the exact answer to life, his pales cheeks become redder with a rose colored blush as I pull him out the wardrobe closet and into my embrace.

"Let me in Ritsu. You don't have to be alone if you don't want to. You have me now and I will NEVER leave you, even if you do push me away I will stay because I love YOU.

Carrying him bridal style I lay us on the bed allowing Ritsu to sob all his anguish in my chest while rubbing his back soothingly. Its ok now Ritsu. Let it all out. My heart constricted with each tear he shed wishing I can make him smile again.

"Y-you know" he hiccups calmed a bit "When we-we had our f-f-fights…I would l-lock my d-door and hide in my closet I-in fear he would g-get m-me."

My jaw tighten.

So that's how bad it was huh.

"Let's get some sleep ok." I kiss his head feeling him nod and snuggle closer dozing off. Chuckling at his cuteness I place a butterfly kisses on his tearstain eyes and mouth.

Little did I know I was being watch.

* * *

Nails clawed in the frame at the sight of MY lover being with _HIM_!

The dumb fucks forgot to close the door following the stupid's brunet's family here I saw everything.

How much I would LOVE to go in there and slit ricchan's throat or maybe have him kidnapped by gangs so they can fuck the shit out of him like Takano did.

Coming to a resignation, I smile crookedly. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I will get this over and done with but first I'll let them have their **LAST** moment together before I send the young coworker of an idiot to his grave.

Turning I walk to my room I'm sharing with Mino but as I get closer Yokozawa is waiting for me by the door.

"Yokozawa san?" I make an innocent confuse look.

"We need to talk" anger leaks out "NOW."

In a bad mood already, I resist the urge to flip him off and say "HELL NO" but no, if I want my plan to go without any distractions I need as less people around me as possible.

"Of course~" I smile showing my teeth "come in~ come in~"

* * *

**Yeah 20 chapters now! (^_)^ **

**it's short i know but i am currently working on the date chap i promise! there's just some complications going on with it and...god i sound really old when i talk like this lolXD **

**OH AND MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP ON MONDAY! **

**I feel so old! QAQ**

**now enough off my rambles! you read. you _should_ review. AND THEN YOU CAN ALL NEGLECT ME AND HAVE SOME COOKIES! **

**XD**

**Come to the dark side.**

**we have SIH and GRAVITAION but most importantly...JOHNY DEPP!**

***MAJOR NOSEBLEED AND DIES***


	21. making love

**Hey guys, sorry for the delay really I am but I've been going through some shit lately and got grounded. My phone and laptop was taken away but I really need to type right now cause I just want to curl in on myself and cry really bad.**

**Yesterday my dog died, I found him, and well I had a full blown panic attack because of it. Haah…they buried him but i…I just couldn't be there when they did. **

**It's a good thing I wrote this before everything happened though because I don't know if I'll be able to write happy stuff right now. **

**Like always; povs**

**1; Ritsu**

**2; Yukina**

**3; Sinful**

**Enjoy I guess.**

* * *

To trust or not to trust.

That has always been my #1 question after my first love vandalized my heart and ripped it out of my chest brutally. For 10,11 now, years I have wanted my heart back. However, being here, with new found love, I feel as if he's not only picking up the pieces of my heart but he's actually making me a new one.

With him I feel whole.

Hehe it's ironic.

I find myself thanking Takano for killing my heart. If he didn't I would have never met Yukina. Sweet kind Yukina.

With him I find I can trust once again. He gives me the courage to love again and let EVERYONE know with no shame that he is mine. God I have never felt like this since…EVER!

Waking up, I groggily wipe away the sleepiness from my eyes.

"Yukina?" I look beside me noticing the missing comforting warmth. Wondering where Yukina could be, the bathroom light Catches my eye making me thank kami sama for once.

"Yukina" knocking I go into panic when I hear a thump with cussing.

Before thinking I throw open the door and rush in asking "Are you alrigh—"

MY. GOD.

Red brakes out from my neck to my face "Ah…ano….GOMEN!" faster than 1 second I turn around explaining frantically. "I thought you were hurt or something because I heard you Fall and swear. I didn't mean to…t-t…TOWALKINONYOUNAKED!" the words fly out in a breathe.

My ears must be the color of cranberries!

With a grunt, Yukina's luring voice beams "It's ok. I fell. Its hard showering with a broken leg you know." That's right…poor thing.

"Oh" stupid! Say something! "Uh…would you like me to help you wash?" realizing what came out I mentally kicked myself. "I meant if you you want, wait that's not what it sound like! Oh please just forget it!"

A big soft hand latches itself to my wrist, tugging me further in the bathes. "I'll like that, thank you." Yukina's husky voice breathes filling me with heat down my spine.

His hands travel to the front of my jeans as intoxicating lips attach themselves to my neck. God I think I'm melting into putty now. And when his finger tips go up my shirt, making contact with sensitive skin, my flesh burns.

Spats of pleasure, anticipation, increases as Yukina strips me of clothing. I feel nothing except skin rubbing skin. His sweet butterfly kisses.

Us washing each other with soap. So painfully slow.

I swipe my hands lightly on his thigh, cautious of his broken leg. To my joyous surprise—Yukina is ticklish! He tried covering his snort.

Tried and failed.

His laugh makes my heart soar. Its so beautiful.

Chuckling at him I gasp out surprised when a finger inserts itself in my entrance, sniffing out my sweet spot.

Moans leave me involuntary. Beat red, pleasure turn to ecstasy as another finger inters.

"Ritsu y-you're so t-tight" blushing I say nothing and (calming my nerves) I grab hold of my lover's manhood (Which is big! Probably bigger than Takano san!) and begin pumping him.

Groaning he bucks in my hand.

I want to pleasure him as well. I want him to fill good too.

Gaining confidence from his moans, I kiss up his chest timidly while pumping him faster.

"R-Ritsu stop i-I gonna" he's too late.

Our eyes meet and something clicks as we stare.

There's no lust glazed eyes, no sweet nothings whispered, and no 'heat of the moment' type thing as we get lost in each other eyes. Our souls.

Slowly and gently we kiss and it says everything more than words are able to. This is not fucking, it definitely not sex. This is making love.

Love as our body AND souls become one.

"I love you ritsu" that voice whispers, like a lullaby. I close my eyes and listen. Then repeat those beautiful words "I love you too…Kou."

How did you steal my heat so fast?

Just as think the question, Yukina echoes it aloud.

"How did you manage to steal my heart so fast ritsu?" directing me onto his shaft, we moan in unison. My eyes tear up from how huge he is.

Definitely bigger than Takano san.

"Thief" he smile helping me ride him. I quickly go my own rhythm though and wrap my arms around his neck gluing our lips together.

My insides tense, gonna cum, and by the way Yukina's muscles are tensing too he's close behind. Speed up, we cum, together.

* * *

I woke up smiling, heart bubbling so much it feels it'll explode. My smile grew as I look down at my sleeping lover cuddling my chest.

After we made love, we only had enough strength to make it to the bed. We didn't dry or change.

Ritsu's amazing.

I love him so much it hurts.

What am I to do if I ever lost you?

The question scares me so much I don't know why I even thought it.

"Kou?" he awakens.

"yes"

"How is your leg?"

My chest flutters. He's always thinking about me.

How can someone who was so jaded and broken be so kind and caring?

"I'm fine" blushing (Yes I blush) I kiss his head "You worry too much."

Now he blushes And hides his beautiful face in my chest.

"Is that wrong?" his breathe tickles me.

"No silly" my hold tightens "I like it when you fuss, it's cute."

"AHEM" we freeze solid "I hate to disrupt this beautiful moment but…" sinful comes in front of the bed covering her nosebleed with her sleeve. "Mama sent me to get ritsu for he can ready for the kendo battle."

"Oh" Awe. My heart sinks as my lover plops up with his hands. I don't want him to go.

"C-can you leave so I can change?" he asks sinful.

"Sure but right after this!" she hold up a phone and takes picture then runs out faster than a ninja. "I'm sooooo saving these as my wallpaper!" she yells.

She…I don't know what to think of her.

* * *

Yah—free porn woo!

I am so making copies of these and selling them!

Porn and cash—hell yeah!

* * *

**Please review. i don't know when imma write or type again but don't worry i;m not gonna be gone for years like other authors but i won't be posting week after week for some time. i want to spend the rest of this week grieving for my dog who was a happy and carefree and rebelious and liked barking at everyone but licking them too! **

**death just took him too soon you know.**

**you know what just...bye.**


	22. soul mates

**The moment you all have been waiting for!**

**Ta-da~**

**THEIR DATE!**

**I apologize for my neglecting this story i really am sorry but i got side tracked with many things including the sudden inspiration for fragile heart. i didn't mean to leave you guys hanging in this story honest! but when inspiration comes knocking i must heed her sweet call!**

**all dramatic lol**

**anyways~ you can all thank pink frozen rose for me typing this chapter. she got mad at me for not posting anything lol. i gave her a rainbow stuff bunny:3**

**1 pov; Yukina! where will he take ritsu for their date?**

**2 pov; Ritsu! see how much he changed since being with Yukina! man i think Yukina rubbed off on him a bit too much lol;) **

**3 pov; Sinful-_- enjoy her ways people though...you might hate me in the end *runs away***

**also before i forget again like always;**

**Disclaimer: If this was mine and not Shungiku Nakamura sensei's then oh boy how warped it'll be O.O I'll make all the boys run for their money haha! Perhaps one day if i get into a coma sekai ichi hatsukoi will be mine in my sleep but no:/ Poor me lol.**

**enjoy~**

* * *

"Hiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

The kendo battle is amazing!

Boy does Ritsu have a lot of family. They're amazing at this sport. One guy whacks his opponent with the bamboo stick in the head making him fall over and lose. Man, good thing they're wear those head armor.

Now I can understand why my mom always thought this sport was dangerous.

I hope Ritsu will be ok. He did tell me it has been years since he's been in a keno battle, more less practice it.

Speaking of my cute Rittie~

Today is our date!

Oh how I waited for this day!

Yeah we've been going out and talking and such before but it wasn't how I wanted it to be. Romantic. No I am not saying I want it like those dates in the movies. I want us to have fun and enjoy ourselves without the consist nuisance of our exes.

I want Ritsu to laugh and smile to his heart's content without his bastard of an ex there to torture him and hurt him.

I'm fine however.

Kisa hasn't bothered me at all since we broke it off. He's over there in the corner being flirted and flirting back with some hulk guy. If we were still a couple I would be kicking the guy's butt right now but seeing them now, I don't care.

I have Ritsu.

My soul mate for life.

Just as those thoughts come, my little lover comes on the mates—without the armor!?

What is he thinking?!

Please don't try hurting yourself! Was yesterday too much? Is it my fault? Are you planning on getting yourself killed? Don't do it please!

"Calm down will you!" turning to the voice besides me, ritsu's youngest cousin sinful glares in annoyance as if reading my jumble of thoughts. "It's written on your face ya know. Ritsu bro is going to be fine. He doesn't need the armor neither does Hiro bro, watch."

"But!"

"WATCH WILL YOU!" a vain sticks out her temple.

Ritsu in his Hakama (kendo uniform bottom/pants) and kendogi (Kendo uniform shit) stands straight facing his opponent (which happens to be Hiroki san dressed the same as him) with his shinai (bamboo sword) at his side, ready to fight.

They bow then proceed to battle mode as they stalk around each other in circles, waiting for the other to make the first move.

The tension of it all makes the audience (including me) on edge in our seats.

Then it begins.

Hiroki san breaks the silence as he shrieks to the heavens and dash towards my lover swinging his shinai this way and that but Ritsu's fast.

Ritsu blocks and dodges all attacks. His eyes narrow as he seeks an opening to catch his opponent off guard. He moves out the way in time as Hiroki san slashes, the sword barely grazing his body.

Then he attacks!

In a blink of an eye, my enticing lover has disabled his cousin's sword while landing a hit to the gut. A full blown point!

We all clap in admiration, entranced by his skill with the sword.

The battle goes on for two more rounds and in the end, my Ritsu is the victor. Hiroki san, sulkily, admits defeat and leaves with his husband to their room.

Man can Hiroki san be moody when losing.

Ritsu however looks just as uncomfortable as people compliment him on his performance. Shying away from the crowd, he stands by me blushing that cute smile I love so much.

"Wh-what did you think?" the look on that angelic face say my words are the only one that matters so I do what I do best. I answer him honestly.

"I loved it!" going all fanboy, I hug him close as I ramble "You are amazing! I didn't even see you when you knocked Hiroki san's sword away! You were fierce and amazing and just so talented. Man~ how do I ever compete with you? You're just so perfect."

His crimson blood blush deepens and a goofy grin plays itself on those soft pink lips even though Ritsu tries hiding it but fails I know I pleased him more than he'll admit.

"T-thank you"

"No problem" as I kiss his cheek two pairs of eyes watch intently. I glare at them as warning as Ritsu went to go change. I don't want to focus on them today. Today is about me and Ritsu, no one else.

Those two can look all they want but they better stay away and not ruin Ritsu and mine date. I want Ritsu to be happy.

* * *

Our date.

Wow, I never would have pictured more less imagined me going out in public with my boyfriend hand in hand smiling like an idiot.

But here I am.

Showing public affection for the world to see and ironically I don't care. I want the world to see me with Yukina. Let them know he is mine and mine alone.

Also to let girls know to keep their paws off him.

Don't blame me.

A lot of girls are attracted to Yukina like bees to honey but I can't blame them. Yukina's every girl (and boy's) dream. The ideal man.

Perfect.

But I don't get jealous like I would when I was with Takano san. Why? Because with Yukina I know he's faithful and yeah he chatters a lot with the girls out of kindness but in the end he chooses me. For that I trust him wholly.

What can I say?

I'm completely in love with him.

He has managed to break down my walls and steal the pieces of my broken heat. And the wonderful thing is, instead of tossing the broken pieced heart away like most would (and did) he fixed it and made it better.

Each day I'm falling more in love with him.

My one and only soul mate.

"This way Ritsu!" he squeals (even through I'm the one that should be squealing but whatever) as he tenderly pulls me down the street stopping at a cotton candy stand.

He buys two but I translate for him and the stand owner. When we got here, Yukina tried speaking English but it was poor with a broke accent and made me laugh so I translate for him.

He got a purple cotton candy as I got a blue one.

"I love cotton candy!" that amazing smile blinds me for the 100th time as I agree with him.

"So do I!" when I left home and came here 10 years ago I was practically a cotton candy addict. The sweetness was just so good and the warmth when it melts in your mouth always cheered me up when I was down. "They say when you eat too much of something, you'll get sick of it. I don't believe that. I will never tire of cotton candy. I can eat it all day!"

Giggling, Yukina takes my hand around the cotton candy stick and bites off a piece of mine. "Yeah but I prefer to eat you all day if possible."

Gah!

"I-idiot! I'm not edible! So cheesy…"

"But it's true and you think the same don't you?"

"…"

"See."

Damn it!

"How can you read my mind so much?" I know I suck at hiding my emotions but I can't suck that badly…right?

"Because I love you."

One day you shall be the death of me with the way you make my heart beat.

"W-well…" I change the subject "Where to? Do you know where you're going?" this is his first time in England after all.

If possible, that dazzling smile shines more and is that sparkles surrounding him?

"I know don't worry! I think you'll like this place!"

He leads me to a club with a fairy bunny with a wand on the sign called "Twinkle?" when did they build this? "This has never been here before."

Pulling me inside, he covers my eyes so I can't see a thing and guide me further in as he informs me "It just opened up this year. When I planned our date, I asked your aunt and uncle if they knew of a place you'll like to go and they told me about this place. They said it was perfect to bring you here."

When those strong hands are removed from my vision I gasp.

This place… "so cool…"

It's like a parade of art!

Everywhere you look there's people dancing to the DJ music while banging some instrument or drums with paint that glows! Some are even painting beautiful masterpieces on canvases, walls, and each other!

It's so pretty the paint and looks so much fun!

"You like it?" Yukina takes my hand to dance with him.

"This…this is just awesome! I love it!" I laugh as he swings me by my waist on the dance floor.

"You want to paint?" a gleam sparkles in his eyes. He loves painting I know that just as I love art in general but painting…

"I…can't." he looks at me confused and I can't help but blush embarrassed "Painting is my weakness. I suck at it even though I love looking at others paint." Like you.

I would love to see Yukina paint. Though it's too embarrassing to admit out loud so that's another never say out loud thing to add to the list.

"Oh." That smile returns with the gleam "Is that it?" pulling me closer to him as if I was part of his body, he leads me to one of the tables with paint tubes on it without me noticing. "You want to learn then?"

Is that a trick question?

"I can teach you." As he says this I feel his hand guiding mine to pick the tubes up.

"You want to teach me?" the spots his hands were still burn sweetly that I have to suppress a moan.

"Of course! In return I want a kiss." His breath makes me shiver involuntary; I can feel his smile of satisfaction from making me like this.

Bastard, you're enjoying this aren't you?

I am as well.

"A kiss?" but that doesn't mean I'm going to surrender easily in this deal. "How about this; if you can teach me to paint as well as you, I'll give you more than a kiss back at the hotel." Whispering the last part I smirk when he shivers just as I did moments ago.

Ha! How you like that!

"Deal?"

"Deal."

We grab the tubes of paint and go to an empty canvas to begin the lesson.

Could painting be anymore sensual?!

* * *

So here's the deal peeps.

I followed the two love struck birds on their date. Don't judge me. It was worth it and i was recording all their fluffiness until they went into that club. Cursing for being underage and short (Fuck you genes) I waited by a tree in the park on the other side of the club.

It was getting late already. The sun was beginning to settle down giving into the darkness of the night.

I wonder what Ritsu bro and his man are doing right now?

Smirking, sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oo many perverted things cross my mind about their activities until I see one certain raven hulk walking down the street trying to act like he's on a stroll when it's obvious he's trying to spy or sabotage Ritsu bro's date.

Like hell I'll let that happen.

As if this was some poorly made scene in a suckish movie, my cousin and his seme comes out of the club. They're laughing and covered in paint oblivious to the bastard heading there way.

I was getting out from the tree, on my way over there to kick the guy's ass when someone beat me to it.

It was one of my cousin, Ken, big like the hulk himself with that short old baby faced man. Both of them looked so demented and well threatening hateful. Ken grabbed Takano douche shirt and pushed him far into the road.

Everything happened so fast that when it was over there was ambulance, people, a guy screaming he didn't see them and that he didn't mean to...

Them!?

It was just one person!

Wasn't it?

Dread settling in my stomach, I summon my courage to look on the ground where the source of blood was coming from.

Oh god...

My heart raced, threatening to burst out of my chest.

So much blood...

Unable to resist, I run to the lumps on the road, crying my eyes out.

No no no NO!

Yukina is straight by me crying as hard as me as we are forced away by paramedics.

"NO!" he screams "Ritsu! Ritsu no!" sobs whack his body as he falls to the ground crying.

Numb at what i witnessed, the only family member that has been my friend, accepted me for my ways, took care of me when no one else had the time...

Just saved his ex from getting full blown hit by a semi truck.

What a date this turned out to be for the two soul mates.

* * *

**DON'T KILL ME *Hides in emo corner for safety*  
**

**It's all part of the plan!**

**Just keep cool until i post the next chapter.**

**Now that i begged for mercy**

**REVIEW!**


	23. imagination and prayer

**HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**WOW!**

**All your reviews made me smile (even though someone tried to kill me lol) anyways I noticed I haven't done any of the names in a while now. Hmmm let's fix that shall we?**

**Hiyokocchi; I can assure you Ritsu getting hurt IS part of SOMEONE'S plan just not Takano's:3**

**HiguraSHi18990; ah the well-known hate/love feeling lol don't worry I understand. I get like that when my family takes my sketch book or notebook with my permission:3 no one is allowed to touch my shit lol.**

**XcaughtLikeAflyX; do I enjoy torturing you? No not at all lol but I do enjoy making a chapter where shit goes down after such a nice time and then ends in a cliffy:3 think of it as a novella (Spanish soap opera show) very dramatic lol. Or lifetime shows.**

**Kage no Hato; yeah your curiosity overcame your hatred! *claps in applause* hope you enjoy the next chapter dear chap!**

**Akira-chan303; yeah…lots of people tell me they hate Takano in here and that lets me know I did my job right lol! And hahaha oh my you wish it was just him getting hit? Haha that's true but then there wouldn't be any drama (or would there 0.0) *thinks on it* ano…I like this drama better!**

**Demonsnight; awe! Thank youXD I personally thought people would tire of this story and toss me out like trash:D glad to know I'm wrong;)**

**CiciGee1; welcome Cici, I couldn't help but notice what you told me. It's ok I have that problem to but I still have to finish the story but yeah I come up with so many scenarios that I sometime pass out. Sorry if that sounds weird but it's trueXD and Ritsu getting g hurt is all in the plan;)**

**Pink Frozen Rose; NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DON'T COMMIT IT! THINK OF ALL THE ASIAN BABIES TAKANO AND RITSU HAVE! Also *dodges knives, plates, and desks* you missed me:3 **

**Forever-fangirling1997; sorry…*looks away* well look on the bright side; when September comes and you can read again, this story would most probable be over:3**

**Now that, that's taken care of; Povs!**

**1; Takano *hides behind table***

**2; (who missed him!) Yokozawa!**

**3; Yukina *cries* poor guy:l**

**4; ME! well I am a narrator lol but no worries mine is short because I'm just that bad at narrative pov:3**

**Disclaimer; nope nope nope. The only thing I own is my soul and I'm not so desperate to give that up for ownership of Sekai ichi Hatsukoi. I'll leave that to its rightful owner because she's just cool like that:D**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

I don't understand what happened.

It was all a blur when it happened.

I was on my way to the club to bring my Ritsu back and apologize and to beg him for forgiveness. I wanted to make everything, every hell I made him go through right. I wanted to fix us.

Fix the heart I broke…numerous times.

I was few steps away when I saw them coming out the club covered in paint. They were laughing and blabbing about how amazing the club was oblivious to my presence nearing. I forced the jealousy down my burning heart when I saw them hand in hand.

My love smiling brightly for the first time in such a long time, at last being the Oda I remember 11 years ago. Honest.

If I want to make things right between us then I have to keep my anger as low as possible.

So as I was saying;

I was steps away when Kisa and some hulk like ape came towards me with these ugly demented smiles. The gleam in their eyes made them look like psychos out for a kill.

Ignoring them, I continue on my way, and smile when Ritsu notices me.

That smile was short lived when I feel the hulk guy's monkey hand yank my shirt and drag me to the side walk's edge.

With a sneer he throws me far into the street just as a semi-truck coincidentally is driving by.

At that moment everything went in slow motion.

I saw the truck coming towards me

I saw Ritsu running towards me, shouting my name as his paint covered body covered me from the impact of the truck.

I couldn't move.

I wanted to shout at him to stop, tell him to turn back, but I couldn't.

I froze in body and voice as we got hit.

Pain shot up my body forcing my head to make contact with the ground.

Blood seeped out beneath me but it wasn't all mines.

My body refused my demands to get the hell up and cradle Ritsu, check his injuries while telling him how sorry I am.

But I couldn't.

Paramedics came, while they were trying to stabilize me I screamed and begged them to forget about me and help Ritsu.

It was so frustrating I began crying.

Me!

Crying!

"Sir please remain still" one paramedic said "Get me some bandages for his head!"

No!

Yukina and that white hair brat Sinful is straight by Ritsu crying as hard as me as they're forced back by the paramedics.

"NO!" he screams "Ritsu! Ritsu no!" sobs whack his body as he falls to the ground crying begging all this to be just a dream.

And as they put me in the ambulance I wish the same too.

They put Ritsu's and mine stretchers together and before blackness creeped over me, I reached my hand out weakly and held onto his praying that if god was going to be kind for once then he'll take me and let my love live.

Maybe then I will be forgiven of my sins.

Ritsu I'm truly sorry.

Angry bright whiteness blinded my eyes when they opened.

"Wha…?"

Turns out that angry whiteness is actually very VERY white walls' looming over me making me feel claustrophobic as I take in this tiny ass room of death.

And if you guessed it, yes, I am in a friggin hospital.

My body aches as if I haven't used it in so long. One movement and I hiss from the pain. How did I get here? The memories are a blur but I can recall walking….I was on my way to get Ritsu back.

Some hulk guy with, I think it was Kisa, came and threw me in the streets when a truck came driving by.

I saw the lights

Seen the truck nearing

Then…then…

**Ritsu shielded me.**

Oh no…no, no, no, no, NO!

Ritsu why would you do that?

You hate me don't you?

You wanted me to suffer didn't you?

So why…

"Takano." A familiar draws me from my close anxiety attack. Yokozawa, my most trusted friend, is standing by the door of the room; looking at me with sorrowful eyes. "I see you're awake."

Knowing what I want to ask so badly, he for the first time hesitates, but then opens his mouth knowing he can't keep things from me.

"As you can see you're in a hospital. You were hit by a truck but it wasn't as bad as the doctors thought. They say that due to being shielded by Onodera…the only injury you got was the concussion from when your head made contact with the ground. You've been out for 3 month."

"What about…" I can't even finish it dammit!

"The little bug is alive but since he took most of the hit he's still comatose."

Coma, he's in a coma?

All because of me.

Tsk!

"I want to see him" I threw off the itchy blanket and tried standing but Yokozawa held me down forcing me to look in his eyes.

"Enough Masamune" those intense blue eyes narrowed in an animalistic way "When are you going to see that it's over? Since he left, you've been crazy and abusing him in every way you can. When is enough going to be enough from you? When are you going to man up and let him go?"

He never talked to me like this. Ever!

"I…I can't…"

"Listen to me Masamune. You were the one that wronged him and broke his heart way worse than what he did to you. The past is the past, let him go and move on to live your life. Also, if he wakes up, apologize to him for everything."

Then he walks away out leave me to think on his words.

* * *

It was hard for me to say those words to my best friend and ex-lover but it's true.

When he broke down that day I arrived at the hotel, I seriously thought it was all Onodera fault. It got me so mad I was going to beat the shit out the bug once I put Takano to sleep. Who would have thought I would change my mind and actually pity the small guy?

I could not believe my ears when my own best friend confessed all the abusing and cheating and raping he did to Onodera while they were still together. I remember thinking 'this isn't Masamune. Who is this man in front of me? Surely it's not the man I befriended and had a crush on before.'

The only question swarming in my head like a bee as my said friend sobbed into my chest was "Why?" you loved Onodera so why would you do that? It's not like you.

"I-I don't know" was the answer "When he finally admitted to loving me I was so happy I could die on the spot but then…then I don't know. As we started dating again I was feeling different in some way. We had a bad fight one time and that's when I snapped and left the house. I wanted to burn some steam before I went back. On my walk I met Kisa, we went to a bar close by and I ended up telling him everything. Then next thing I know we were at his place having sex…like old times."

My god…I didn't even know they were sleeping around before!

"When we were finished Kisa told me "You know you can't always be soft on Ricchan. He needs to learn his place around you. You should teach him that. Get physical if you have to." And I did. It happened so fast when my hand connected with his face back home. I was shocked at first but then that weird feeling came back and I starting hitting him over and over again. It just felt…good. Next thing I knew I became so possessive and…just damn plain cold."

…I wish I had something to say.

"Are you stupid?!" yeah that's better. "You…*sigh* I never thought you would be so stupid Masamune. Even I know Onodera didn't deserve any of the things you did to him."

Practically fucked up his life for good now; and Kisa gave him this advice?

Oh I know whose but I'm going to kick when I leave this room.

Coincidentally, said shortie was there at the scene when Masamune and Onodera got hit with the truck. Seems like our talk had no effect on him what so ever.

Too bad for the old geezer the cops had an eye witness of the whole thing who was more than happy to tell them about what she saw.

They arrested Kisa and that ape guy he was flirting with and good thing too!

The bastard tried killing Masamune and Onodera!

As they took him away he was yelling at Yukina say stuff like "I was supposed to be your one and only! Love only me! I hope Ricchan dies a painful slow death! Then maybe you can come to your senses and crawl back to me where you belong! LOVE ME!"

I knew he was screwed up in the head but not to the point of being a killer psycho out for blood. Shows how much I know of people.

I stop in my tracks as I passed one room. In there was many machines and get well soon gifts surrounding the bed of the patient. His eyes were still black with a bandaged head. Broken arm, ribs, his femur, internal bleeding. Most of the not so deep cuts and bruises went away but he still needs the machines to breath and stuff.

The doctors don't even know if the bug's gonna wake up at all.

And the worst part is the man sitting in the chair by his side, holding his hand, has to suffer seeing him like this. I couldn't handle it if Kirishima was in that bed and me in the seat.

I'll probable cry my eyes out.

You can't really imagine it even when you see it in front of your very eyes.

* * *

Can't even imagine

Don't want to imagine

Sad part is this isn't even some fucked up imagination.

What I remember that day; we got out of the club kissing and laughing about how messed up his painting was. He told me he sucked at painting but the reason why it came out messed up is because we kept fooling around.

We got covered in paint from a paint war that broke out.

After a while, Ritsu looked shocked as he looked over my shoulder. I turned to see what he was looking. Kisa was there with that guy he was flirting with in the kendo battle along with Ritsu's ex but it looks like they were ganging up on the tall raven.

I was ready to shout when the man grabbed Takano and threw him the street while a truck was driving by.

A crash broke everyone out their peaceful evening.

People rushed to aid the in injured and dialed 911 (A/N; that not Japan's police phone # but I don't know it so go with it please) but I stood there staring for a moment. Too shocked at what happened.

I got out of it when I saw Sinful child frame run over to her cousin's body crying her eyes out. In no second less I was there crying too, screaming that this wasn't real.

"NO!" I screamed to life itself "Ritsu! Ritsu no!" don't leave me.

The paramedic pulled me away as they took him. Feeling like my soul was ripped away from my body I fell to my knees shaking with sobs.

The cops came and asked what happened but I couldn't speak. I just wanted to turn back the time and stop Ritsu from sacrificing himself like that.

Next I know, Kisa was being cuffed and taken away. Before he was gone he screamed madly "I was supposed to be your one and only! Love only me! I hope Ricchan dies a painful slow death! Then maybe you can come to your senses and crawl back to me where you belong! LOVE ME!"

Then it hit me.

This is all my fault.

Being with me led Ritsu to get hurt and now he might not ever open those beautiful soft eyes. Crying silently, I squeeze his hand softly praying for the billionth time for him to heal and wake up soon.

I know you're up there somewhere god.

So here's the thing.

I know I never once set foot in a church or prayed or anything really when it came to you but that doesn't mean I don't believe in you and try to do what you want me to. I know being gay or bi doesn't really go well with your liking but please, please don't take Ritsu away. He's too innocent and kind and sweet and…and…

I love him so much.

They say you take time to make the perfect love for someone and I believe it. You gave me Ritsu right? So why would you want to take him away from me? If it is because you think he's too broken for me then you're wrong.

I don't care if he's broken.

My heart is connected with him and I will do whatever it is to piece him together. No matter how long, how much work it is, even if it takes me forever, you can't have him.

You can't take him away from me I'm begging you.

Let him live because he's like your light shining down on us. So pure and innocent, all inside a broken porcelain body. Let your light shine through him. Please. If you have to take my life then just bring Ritsu back to us and if you're as generous as I believe you are lord; bring him back whole please.

Amen.

* * *

After praying for his beloved, Yukina sighed once more. Seeing his lover like this, so lifeless, crushed his heart beyond bits.

If he could turn back the time he would to stop Ritsu from getting hurt.

The poor brunet didn't deserve this.

Yukina knew Ritsu did what he did to save his ex and yes that seems Ritsu still cared for Takano but Yukina wasn't mad. It was just how Ritsu was.

He would save even his bitter enemies if their lives were endangered. Even if it means the brunet has to put his life on the line.

This proves it.

He acted on impulse but Yukina knows his heart is his alone. Not Takano's or anybody else but him.

But that doesn't mean it stopped the tall blonde from worrying about their love. What is Ritsu wakes up and decides he can't love Yukina because he's still has feeling for Takano? What if he decides their dating was nothing more than not wanting to be alone?

Groaning from the constant worries, Yukina stood up. Bending down and placing a kiss on his lover's hand, he walked out the room. He needed something to eat and coffee if he wanted to stay awake for his lover again tonight.

Just as he walked out the door and down the halls like he did every night since the accident, he failed to notice the slight twitch of the small hand lying on the bed.

Nor did he notice the blurry green eyes slowly opening to take in their surroundings.

* * *

**Dra- dra- DRAMA~~~**

**What you guys think?**

**Tell me, tell me**

**Til next time:3**


	24. the heart doesn't forget

**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !**

**HELP ME PLEASE!**

**PINK FROZEN ROSE CHAN IS TRYING TO KILL ME!**

**I SAID I WAS SORRY! **

**AND SORRY TO ALL OF YOU FOR WHAT I'M ABOUT TO DO IN THIS CHAPTER! Also I will not be doing the pov list for this one because I want to see how many people can guess whose pov who in here:p  
**

**Disclaimer; nope still not mine. *sighs* like every other sekai ichi hatsukoi fan out there, it will never be mine only this story and a pack of chocolate pocky. One bite from pocky and you're hooked for life:3**

**So enjoy~**

* * *

Coming into the cafeteria where all the cardboard tasting food is I get beckoned over by ritsu's group of family. They come regularly too, offering their support to their family and me.

They were all hit hard when the cops went and told them about Ritsu's condition. However the one hit the hardest is sinful. She stood away from the rest of the family.

The little girl doesn't even bother to be herself anymore. She's not loud anymore or get creepy or curse everyone like me out when talking to her. Like a zombie she just wonders around as if there's no life in her at all.

Depressed.

Sometimes I see her standing in front of the widow of ritsu's room looking in at her cousin. The fear of him never waking up is evident in her red eyes. Yet she doesn't break down into sobs like she did on the day of the accident.

Zombified

Lost without her role model

Along with Ritsu, her family is worried for her too. They each tried comforting her but like the other she pushed them away isolating herself in grief.

Ritsu wouldn't want this.

Knowing this I go to her. "Hey" her back is turned to me as I sit beside her. She hasn't touched the food they gave her. It's cold already. "How you holding up?"

No answer.

Sighing I place my hand on her lithe back.

"You know sinful…You'd give Ritsu an anxiety attack with the way you're acting." My lame joke does nothing to ease her tension.

Trying a different approach I allow a small smile to show remembering Ritsu telling me of his childhood and his time in England.

"When I got here and asked who you were, remember, Ritsu would tell me how he would take care of you. He would tell me how much of a trouble maker you were and how he always had to keep an eye on you. Also that it was never a dull moment being you care taker. Every time he told me something about you he beamed with pride as if you were his own child. You two must be very close."

"We are."

Eyes wide, I look at here looking back at me with shining eyes.

"They think I don't know." tiny droplets of tears fall "about my birth. I know I'm a bastard's child of a man that raped mama when she was young. They try keeping it from me yet she and this papa still kept me and treated me like their own but I know I'm not. I'm an outcast to the family. They welcome me with open arms and love but that won't change the fact I'm not fully family. I always felt lost until Ritsu came."

More tears fell on his pale fists as she went on.

"Ritsu was the only family that fought to get close to me. When I was younger I pushed everyone away even family so they just left me be. Not Ritsu bro though. When I pushed him away over again and again, he remained by my side. He was awkward, shy, too soft, and outcast like me. I remember I lashed out one day and told him I hated him and that he was like the rest, not wanting me to hear the truth of my birth. I demanded to know the truth and Ritsu gave it to me. He told me everything that he knew then took me in his arms when I cried. I thought I was a monster but you know what he said to me that day? He said "Shhh child, I'm here, it's ok. Shhh just because your birth father did that doesn't mean you don't belong here. You do. To us, we see a beautiful girl, not the offspring of a monster. Listen to me sinful, I will never lie to you understand and we all love you as our own, just don't push us away anymore." After that he rocked me to sleep and watched me through the night. He's the reason I trust people. He's my true family."

Speechless at this, I take the poor thing in my arms. I don't know what's worse; losing the one I love or watching a small child losing her family then growing up in this world with no guidness thinking this was all her fault.

Ritsu…please wake up.

We need you, especially sinful.

I know!

Looking down at the child I say softly "Let's go see him, want to? He needs more company then me you know."

Catching the drift, she nods her white mop of hair croaking "Yes."

We walk to the room talking about my lover but stop at the foot of the door. No words are spoken as we stare wide eyed at the brunet on the bed.

"Ritsu!"

"Nii chan!"

We both say together and rush to him. Looking at us as if we lost our marbles, he asks through the breathing mask "Sinful? What are you doing here and why am in a hospital?"

Tearing up she hugs him answering "You were hit by a truck Ritsu! We all came, the whole family."

Nodding that he understood I help him get the mask off ready to kiss him until…

"I'm sorry sir but who are you?"

* * *

Damn.

Shattered is the look on Yukina's face when those words left Ritsu bro's chapped lips.

Down casted

Plunged into depression like no other

This makes no sense. Ritsu loves Yukina, it's in his eyes. So why can't Ritsu bro remember him? Ready to tell Ritsu bro who Yukina is, the tall giant stops me.

"I'll go page a nurse and tell the family" sadness rains over him as he drags his feet out leaving me feeling nothing but pity for the guy.

"Sinful" my cousin calls, his voice soft "What's going on?"

Suspicion eats at me the way he's looking.

Lost

Confused

That's it "Ritsu do you remember anything?" please let him be faking and making a really horrible sick joke.

"…I just started my new job at Marukawa…"

Damn.

What next?

"Ritsu!"

"Takano san? What are you doing here?"

Gee right when it couldn't get any worse, damn fate, I'll kick your ass one day.

Just as I was going to kick the ravenette out, my family came rushing in with the doctors and nurses asking things after another. It was so noisy; Ritsu covered his ears in pain.

"Shut up!" I yelled grabbing their attention "Move so the doc can take a look at Ritsu." When the doctor stepped forth I grabbed his sleeve practically begging pathetically that he helps my cousin. "He can't remember some things."

Saying he'll check it out, we get chased out the room where more commotions erupt. Takano douche vs. my family mixed with Hiro bro and auntie's mega wrath.

But what catches my eye is the lone silhouette making his way down the hall away from Ritsu bro's room.

Running and catching up to the man, I pull his large hand in my tiny one "Where are you going?" turning he looks like soldier that already lost a war. "Yukina…"

"He wins…"

"What?"

"Takano san wins ok" tears stung his eyes making them puffy and red "He doesn't remember me…"

His tears, that defeated look, it pisses me off!

"So?"

He gives me this kicked puppy look that ticks me off more so I kick him in his chin. He wants to make that look; I'll give him something to make that look.

"Owe!"

"So what if he can't remember you _NOW_? He needs you by his side. Don't leave him like other people would. Don't please…Yukina…bro."

Silence

"But what if he never remembers me?" the question rings loud.

He has a point.

What if Ritsu bro's memories never come back? What then? Will he ever remember Yukina? Thinking so many things at once, a memory comes to mind.

It was when I hit my head as a toddler. They had to get me stitches and the doctor said I didn't have amnesia. When I asked what that was, they explained but succeeded in making me cry on Ritsu bro's shoulder say I didn't want to forget him.

And what he told me made me smile at his wisdom.

"Listen Yukina, someone lovingly (like you need a name) told me; _just because a __**PERSON**__ forgets the ones close to them don't mean their __**HEART **__forgets. _Think about that."

Making my point, I take my leave.

* * *

**Again i apologize but lets face it.  
**

**Ritsu got hit pretty badly-_-**

**He's bound to wake up with some memory loss:p**

**lol what will Yukina do?**

**Go back home...**

**Make ritsu's heart his again...**

**Let Takano sweep in and take ritsu back and then regret it for life.**

**ANY GUESSES?!**

**By the way what did you think of sinful's speech? and the part she called Yukina "Yukina bro"?**

**sinful...can you take it away~**

**Sinful; Yosh! alright people *evil grin* if you all want ritsu bro and Yukina (mention anything about our touchy moment and you die) to get back together and live happily ever after with Takano lying dead somewhere in a gutter with other hobos then...**

**REVIEW!**

**or else ._.**

**me; ^_^lll**


	25. strangely familiar

**Tada~~~~~**

**I feel so good when inspiration hits and lol thank you everyone for bringing me back up! **

**109 reviews WOOOOOOOO!**

**I honestly thought i wouldn't get it back when google screwed me over in my last account lol but yeah! i was wrong!**

**NAMES!**

**_HiguraSHi18990;_ Hahahahaha i see you're in denial;) well stay cool and here! hope you enjoyXD**

**_Imagine Wings; _Aaaaaaah yes but Takano sadly keeps his distance from Ritsu's family which in one part in here indicates it. Though he does eat breakfast with them:p And yes i know i keep forgetting to capitalize the S in Sinful's name but that is because i keep forgetting it's not a real name so my computer don't capitalize the S when i type her name lol. sorry~**

_**hiyokocchi;**_ **Muwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahaha! thanks for understanding lol ^_^ **

**_CiciGee1; _welcome back Cici! and don't make that sad face *wipes tears* it'll be ok...maybe:l**

**_pink frozen rose;_ the quest was you? O.O so...you're no mad at me anymore? *cute pleading Neko eyes* and you want Ritsu and Yukina to have babies? hmm...maybe i could make a sequel to this hmm...interesting. lol**

_**Akira-chan303;**_ **I wish i could but i did do that:/ Lol well...i hope you like this chapter lol and thanks for the support:D **

**_animegirl516;_ Takano; *runs away* DON'T SHOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me; ready...aim...FIRE! lol**

**_Manga Ren;_ hahahaha sorry but you know i love drama~~~ by the way is this soon enough? lol *gives you cookie* enjoy! also you are correct! **

**_The valkyrie goddess;_ hmmm who knows who side Yokozawa will help out maybe both maybe noneXD and yes you are right! lol**

**_DeathNoteLover235; _lol i have been reading your reviews and rolling on the ground laughing! like Cici i welcome you lol and glad you're enjoying this story:D it feels so good when someone gives these couples a chance haha and thank you for you condolences of my dog. pets are family and i'm glad others see as well besides me. thank you. and hahah i'm happy you and others like Sinful and drama! Also you do not have to worry lol i will keep this story going til the end. but i am sad to say it is coming to an end maybe this weekend or the next:( til next time:3 **

**_jajajoker08; _Yosh! How is this then!**

**so there we have it people!**

**Thank you so much and enjoy!**

**Disclaimer~ I HAVE MY DREAMS DON'T I?! *Shoves disclaimer person off a cliff* now enjoy people! and also remember these hints from other chapters *wink wink***

* * *

Different is the only word that plaques my mind. Something in my life is different but I can't seem to put my finger on it.

I feel like I forgot something very important to me leaving me to feel this unbearable emptiness down in my core.

I don't like this feeling.

It's too upsetting.

Like I'm lost in some dark forest with no idea where to go.

"Onodera" haah and then there's _that._

I have no clue what happened or what's been going on. All I remember is that it was the last day of my first week in that damn shojo department and I was freaking out because my ass of a boss turns out to be my first love.

Next thing I know I wake up in the hospital IN England. Apparently I'm 26 now and came out to my parents which surprisingly they accepted or so claimed to have. They keep trying to kill Takano san which by the way won't let me talk to anyone. Not even my family.

I was hit by a semi-truck and stuck in a coma for 3 or more months. I don't know.

How or why I have no clue. The doctors won't tell me; said I needed to try and remember things on my own but not to force myself. Whatever.

Isaka san did say I got a vacation and that it's extended to my injuries.

That's good I guess…

"Onodera" that voice calls again. I'm too tired to snap at my boss. Not to mention when he's close I get this odd feeling of…fear?

Yeah he's my first love and all, anyone would be scared, but the scared I feel is different. Like I'm afraid of him hurting me in general. Deathly afraid.

I can't stop myself from flinching when he moves even in the slightest or the unpleasant shivers when he kisses me.

Then when he tries hugging me or ruffling my hair I feel vomit rise up. Huh. Wonder if I'm turning straight?

Said man touches my forehead making me jerk away "What?" my voice is a bit shaky despite the fact I tried hiding the tint of edge in it.

"It's time for breakfast, come, your family's waiting." I make sure to avoid eye contact as he helps me sit up and off the bed.

The doctors released me after another 3 weeks of being there making sure I was healthy enough to go. I can't leave back to Japan til my wounds heal completely.

And I got to say it's so lonely.

Sure I have my family here. Sinful makes it her job to visit me and bicker with my boss. As for my boss, he's technically stalking me when he doesn't have work.

But I still feel so lonely like I'm an abandoned puppy someone left behind in the dirt.

Haah I think I need to see a counselor about this.

"Takano san…" my voice comes out uneasy and small but gets his attention either way.

"Yeah?"

"Can you go alone? I want to be by myself for a bit."

Giving me a look of superstition, he nods, asking "Like me to carry you back to your room?"

"No thank you."

Hesitantly he nods turning away from me. "Call me if you need anything".

Now I nod waiting for him to disappear. Making sure he did I sigh leaning on one of the walls. This is so weird. I feel weird.

Did I somehow change this year?

I don't even stutter like I use to around Takano san.

And whatever happened to Kisa san? All my other coworkers are here except the short guy.

Pain shot up my head making me grab it.

Before waking up today, I had a weird dream.

_"Yes Onodera tell them." A familiar voice said making my body freeze in cold sweat. I was sitting at a dinner table surrounded by my family and some blond guy who I couldn't see his face. It was a blur. _

_"Tell them how I would drill into you and make you cry out while clinging desperately to me. How you would tell me to be gentle. How you moaned loudly when I didn't. Yes. Tell them everything." _

_My throat contrasted with tears and the desperate urge to puke. That laugh taunted me. I want it to end. The sneers, the feelings, everything._

_Then everything shifted._

_I was in a closet, hiding from someone or maybe it was that voice that taunted me. My heart was racing out of my chest in fear of being found._

_I hear a door open and whimper slightly._

_"Ritsu?" a different voice calls in an angelic tone "Where are you?"_

_Unsure about trusting the voice, I stay quiet in the darkness, listening to the steps look around for me. I hear rustling and start to cry softly._

_"Hey" the steps stop in front of my hiding place as hands attempt to open the door. "Can you open please?"_

_Don't speak_

_"Please" there's desperation in his voice._

_Closing in on myself more I finally speaks "I just want to be…alone right now."_

_"Ritsu…haah…why can't you talk to me about this? Don't you want someone there in the dark with you?" the voice is sad trying to gain my trust making me feel sad but I remain quiet for some time._

_Logic says don't speak_

_Don't trust_

_But something inside me screams_

_Speak up_

_Trust_

_"I'm not use to it…" my voice cracks more as I talk "I'm not use to sharing my problems. I'm so awkward I can't even talk to my family of what goes on in my life without screwing things up. It's easier to deal with things on my own…I'm used to it actually."_

_Always been used to the loneliness._

_"You were always alone huh? Relying on yourself, taking everything life throws without anyone to catch you if you fall. Just to keep yourself sane." The voice replies sounding hurt. Like a child who doesn't get why life is cruel to people._

_Hugging my knees to my chest, the doors are ripped open showering me with light blinding me as the voice continues._

_**"But don't you know a man goes nuts when he's alone in the dark for so long. Don't you believe it's time to change that?"**_

_I feel my cheeks burn as I stare up at the faceless angelic voice as he pulls me out the dark and into his embrace._

_"Let me in Ritsu. You don't have to be alone if you don't want to. You have me now and I will NEVER leave you, even if you do push me away I will stay because I love YOU." _

_"W-who are you?"_

_Chuckling a bit his whispers "You know that answer. You just have to remember."_

That is when I woke up to Takano in my face and me screaming from the shock.

What does the dream mean and furthermore who was that man?

What did he mean I know who he is?

Back to reality I realized I walked around the place and instinctively stopped at the art room. Art always calmed me down and I loved drawing to escape bad things.

Maybe it's time I pick up drawing again?

Allowing a tiny smile, I open the door with my good arm then use it to maneuver inside. Damn having a broken arm and femur really slows a person down.

I should be glad it's not my drawing arm that's broken.

Inside, on the floor, paint tubes and bushes lie all over. With water bowls and towels, smocks and canvas, so lively. I was the only one to make this much of a mess but with paper and sketch books.

Whoever painted these is amazing!

There are flowers and creatures (fiction and nonfiction) and sceneries. Like a different world mixed together.

Catching my breath I hear humming. Some guy is painting a portrait of a giant sakura tree swaying in the wind. It's so breathtaking…

Without noticing it myself I slowly make my way towards the man but…I end up tripping on some smocks and falling. Thus making a ruckus and fool of myself.

Great.

I think I scared him shitless.

"S-sorry…" I say trying to get up only to succeed in hurting myself.

"Don't move so much" my heart jumps when he lifts me bridal style. "Are you ok?" I nod and look into his eyes. They are such a light beautiful color.

Just looking at them makes me nervous.

Avoiding awkwardness I point to his painting "It's lovely" somehow I can't stop myself from full on smiling.

Staring at me he asks "Do you like art?"

_Ba-bump!_

T-this…seems familiar somehow…

"Hai…well I'm not all that good but it use to be a hobby of mine when I was younger." Why do I get the feeling I had this conversation before "Though I suck at painting." I admit laughing nervously.

Smiling along with me (which makes me blush like a girl) he stands taking my good hand "Would you like to learn?"

A tingling sensation shot up from where his hand touches making flutter feeling grow in my stomach. It's so weird and wrong and…and…I find I don't mind the feeling or being touched by him at all.

Am I weird?

Timidly I ask "Sure if you can make me paint as great as y-you."

We make a deal and start painting.

I watch as the brush dances on his canvas creating a whole new world in a matter of time. When he'd done, we look at it awed.

He painted a pure white dove swooping down with a single red rose in its beak. Everything about the painting is magnificent! The way he made it look like it's real and the wind is actually blowing the pedals and feathers.

But it also looks like I've seen it before only in black and white.

Next is mine and boy did I have trouble.

Even though I was trouble we ended up chatting away and laughing and messing around which further ruined my poor painting but it was fun.

Fun and so strangely familiar.

It's like I know this man and did all these things with him before!

It's really weird.

Around him, the odd lonely feeling and being lost vanishes.

I really don't want the day to end and part with him.

Alas but it has to and did. All too fast if you ask me.

I hear Takano san calling for me making me sigh. "I have to go, it was really fun painting with you" wait I didn't even ask him for his name! I feel so ashamed "I'm sorry but I never got to know your name. Mine is Onodera Ritsu." I say as he helped me out the room.

What he says to me stops me cold.

**"You know that answer. You just have to remember…Ritsu." **

Without warning, he pecks me on my cheek then goes back in the art room.

"Onodera there you are!" Takano finds me, standing looking completely dazed out and blushing furiously.

This all…is so…familiar.

"Onodera? Are you ok?"

Am I ok?

"You're crying" huh?

Touching my burning cheeks, he's correct. Tears are falling but why?

Why does my heart feel so frustrated to the point I'm crying?

"Ritsu are you ok?!" My little cousin Sinful runs to me with great concern in her eyes but all I can say is;

"I don't know…"

* * *

**What you think?  
**

**Don't be shy:3**

**hahahaha see his heart does remember things:D**

**so~~~ tomorrow (or later today) i shall type the next chapter but YOU GUYS have to tell me which pov you want for the next chapter.**

**I shall give you a list;**

**1; Ritsu**

**2; Yukina**

**3; Takano**

**If you have any other ideas please don't be shy and let me hear them:)**

**okie dokie?**

**Ritsu dear take it away!**

**Ritsu; Hai, *bows* please review and help Neko san out (PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! I DO NOT WANT TO END UP WITH TAKANO SAN I'M BEGGING YOU) **

**Takano; *comes behind Ritsu* what you say *Dark aura*  
**

**Ritsu; REVIEW! *runs away***


	26. slight ray of hope

**So the people (you guys lol) have spoken!**

**This shall be in *drum roll please***

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~o0o~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**YUKINA'S POV!**

**I want to thank you all who reviewed and lead me to picking the next pov:3  
**

**I hope this chapter does you guys justice~  
**

**Also I ain't doing disclaimers today because the disclaimer person was miraculously thrown off a cliff ^_^ whoever threw her off *evil aura* no one knows them so SUSH!**

**Enjoy~ song by Killswitch Engage called The end of heart ache:3 found it on yahoo for this opening lol. Don't judge me it took forever to find a perfect song!**

* * *

_"Seek me,_  
_Call me,_  
_I'll be waiting_

_Seek me,_  
_Call me,_  
_I'll be waiting_

_This distance,_  
_This dissolution_  
_I cling to memories while falling_  
_Sleep brings release,_  
_And the hope of a new day_  
_Waking the misery of being without you_

_Surrender, I give in_  
_Another moment is another eternity_

_(Seek me) For comfort,_  
_(Call me) For solace_  
_(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart_  
_(Seek me) Completion,_  
_(Call me) I'll be waiting_  
_(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart_

_You know me, you know me all too well_  
_My only desire - to bridge our division_

_In sorrow I speak your name_  
_And my voice mirrors, mirrors my torment_

_(Seek me) For comfort,_  
_(Call me) For solace_  
_(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart_  
_(Seek me) Completion,_  
_(Call me) I'll be waiting_  
_(I'll be waiting here) For the end of my broken heart_

_Am I breathing?_  
_My strength fails me_  
_Your picture, a bitter memory_

_For comfort,_  
_For solace_

_(Seek me) For comfort,_  
_(Call me) For solace_  
_(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart"_

It seems that moment came even if it was only a slight ray of hope; it was hope never the less.

I have trapped myself in the art room since Ritsu got back. My heart screamed to be by his side but I held myself back.

He doesn't remember me.

What if he never remembers me?

Due to this…I'm afraid of him hating me.

That ass of a boss is already monopolizing him from everyone including his own family! He finally has Ritsu and now he isn't letting him go.

It's so nerve wracking!

The things he could be doing to my love.

Insulting him, slapping him,…raping him as well.

Gah!

Don't think such things! Your room is close to Ritsu (after the hospital, his family thought it was best to give him his own room) so if Takano so much as tried to do inappropriate things, I will hear and kick his ass.

My time away from my soul mate was so lonely. I felt like I was falling deep down into a dark hole where I see nothing but black. In there; my fears overtake me, drowning me.

I don't even smile as much or talk like I did when Ritsu was by me. The world just didn't seem bright or colorful anymore.

Just…bland.

I didn't want to be so weak and pathetic. To keep myself sane, deep down I'm holding onto Sinful's words.

_Just because a __**PERSON**__ forgets the ones close to them don't mean their __**HEART **__forgets. _

I hope with all my being that you are right Sinful.

When Ritsu showed up in the art room, my heart skipped many beats. It was clear he still didn't remember me but I noticed some looks he gave and that blush I missed so much. That blush that brightens my dark world.

I ask him things from when we first met hoping it triggered some type of memory. It hurt when it didn't seem to but I still smiled because he was still the Ritsu I remembered. Honest.

The one that blushes cutely

Smiles sweetly

Talks angelically

And paints horribly.

Then all too soon he had to go due to his 'boss' calling him. I gritted my teeth in anger but kept it down for Ritsu's sake as I helped him to the door.

Before we can part, he looks up at me with those memorizing sweet olive eyes. "I'm sorry but I never got to know your name. Mine is Onodera Ritsu."

Wanting to say my name so badly but didn't.

Instead I say **"You know that answer. You just have to remember…Ritsu." **

Then I stole a soft kiss on his cheek without warning before closing the door. I hear Takano's voices and Sinful's as well. What I hear next makes my heart rise and fall.

My love is crying.

I know his heart is struggling to make him remember and I'm sorry I didn't give you probable the biggest hint in this puzzle; but I must know.

How deep is you love for me?

I know this is selfish of me to test you but I want, must know how deep our love truly is.

Will you push to remember what the heart knows?

Or rather forget me and leave me in sorrow?

Frustrated, I bring my knees to my chest, ashamed of the dark thoughts that come to my mind. These doubts I have. I don't want to doubt my lover, not in a million years, but these thoughts won't let me be.

Thinking more about it I weep.

These emotions…I don't know how to handle them.

It hurts so much.

"Yukina bro" a pale child hand pats my back. I don't turn around to look at here though. I don't want anyone seeing this side of me. Not anyone…

Sighing, she leans in and whispers "Don't lose heart, he will remember, Ritsu bro just needs a little push is all." Even turned away from her I can tell she's smiling silently scheming.

"Look what happened today. He told me about a dream he had. That dream sounded awfully familiar. It was about a certain guy who pledged to be with him forever and always after a certain family diner. He was hiding in a closet…ring any bells? "

My eyes widen when she says that.

I turn around wanting to know what she meant but she was gone.

Leaving me alone in this room of paint and paper.

A lonely room without my lover…

But now, instead of depression, I have a slight ray of hope.

A dream she said.

He dreamt about us.

Smiling, I get back up and take out a clean canvas.

Ritsu dreamt about the past which means…he will remember me.

Take a bush and some paint, I know what I want to paint now.

A present for the for the one I love.

* * *

**Uwaaaah! **

**My back hurts like a mega bitch. **

**I have spent idk how many hours on this damn floor thinking and typing this chapter out. Plus the fact I want chips but can't go downstairs to the kitchen to get them due to my sister being down there with her boyfriend-_-**

**I no like being around them, it's too uncomfortable and boring._.**

**I only ate once today and it's already close to late.**

**I'm hungry._.**

**Also i like to apologize if this chapter is horrible:( in my eyes it shall be burned:/**

**Review ne?  
**


	27. void

**Hello people! **

**owe my stomach hurts lol. So i never got the chance to eat yesterday thanks to my sister and her boyfriend so my stomach is killing me. even though i woke up today and practically ran downstairs and made a sandwich and scarfed it down life a wolf lol, my stomach still insists on trying to kill me with pains-_- **

**luckily i had this to distract me! don't worry i will type more chapters but a good friend of mine really wanted me to do a Takano pov here. so this will be short but i hope you enjoy never the less:)**

**first however, names~**

_**pink frozen rose; **_**here you go! i hoped this is acceptable and again i apologize for the shortness:3  
**

_**Hiyokocchi; **_**yes Kisa went to jail *Hooray!* what is happening to him in jail, i'll give you some hints. him, pretty baby face. surrounded by criminals. baths. did this add it all up lol;)  
**

_**The valkyrie goddess; **_**i'm glad you like the song! it took forever to find it for this chapter! HERE! *Gives yukina plush doll*  
**

**_DeathNoteLover235;_ lol once again thank you for encouragement and your kind words. and your right in the anime our sweet Yukina is too confident:D i shall do my best to gain some of his confidence though lol:) **

**_Imagine Wings;_ hahahaha thank you so much! and it's ok, it's my fault that i chose to be on the floor rather than the bed lol. and you want to know what Yukina's painting? kehehehehehe you'll find out~ fufufu~**

**enjoy~**

* * *

Void.

Those olive eyes staring at me but not seeing me at all.

They are void of any emotions towards me and me alone. An emptiness so unexplainable he doesn't bother to speak up but obey my commands.

What is wrong with him?

I never wanted that light in his beautiful eyes to leave. Ever since that day I found him standing outside the art room crying he's been like a zombie. Only fighting when I try touching or caressing him.

I don't like my love like this. Not one bit in the least.

That spark of adoration is nowhere in sight when his gaze is cast at me.

That look that screams I took everything away.

I win.

In the back of my mind, I know this isn't right.

Monopolizing him from friends and family in fear of losing him.

Stopping him from finding that Blondie once more.

This is not right at all but I can't let go.

I don't want to be left alone again in life so I lock him up inside me never to see the sun again. Keep him close with me and only me.

Because in the end, the only one he can hang onto…is me.

I won

I am the victor

So what do I feel like crap?

Something deep in my warped persona is bugging me. that side of me that managed to remain somewhat sane is screaming to let him go.

But I can't.

I don't want to be alone in the dark.

Not again.

Not when I finally got him back.

"Masamune" Yokozawa calls sweeping me away from the abyss of my mind. These emotions I rather have disappear than feel. "When are you going to do what's right?" he asks, a frown gracing his face.

We stood outside of Ritsu's room, in a still zone glaring war.

Me guarding the door and my supposed to be trusted friend: trying to get in to speak with the brunet.

"Still claiming to talk sense into me?" I snapped back.

Eyes narrowing in anger, Yokozawa raises his voice a little. "You can't keep lying to him and prevent him from remembering!"

"Tsk, yes I can and am I might add. He's mine."

Growling, "You already ruined his life you mad man!"

Getting ready to punch each other we stop as the door creak open. Ritsu comes out, hair disheveled with that sometimes annoying bedhead.

"Onodera" Yokozawa taps him. His eyes visible widens when my too pale lover looks at him. Those soulless eyes bearing into blue live ones.

"Sorry" he says lowly "I have to use the bathroom" he makes his way away from as we both watch him waiting for his small frame to be out of sight.

I look back at the man before me as he continues to stare at my love.

A moment passes before he speaks up. "Do you love him Masamune, I mean truly love him?"

Taken aback by the question I answer "Yes" thinking this was the end of it.

But no.

Yokozawa gets the last words.

"Then tell him the truth before he dies more inside. He's starting to remind me of you when we were in college."

Stunned, I stay quiet.

College was my breaking point.

That was the time I died on the inside, the time that void became too big I snapped. I don't want Ritsu becoming like me.

Dead.

He's meant to be happy and alive.

A dove meant to fly.

I understand this…I know this…but I can't follow it.

Walking away from my long time college friend, I say clearly but in a hushed voice "I can't...I don't want to be alone."

I don't want that empty void to form in my chest again.

Thinking on those times my face falls more as I hear my brunet in the bathroom puking. His not the same as Oda.

He's not lively

Doesn't smile

He doesn't even stutter cutely any more.

Everything about this brunet is different towards me.

Just plain emotionally…void.

A void I can't fill

Not anymore.


	28. tell me who you are

**So,**

**First pov; Ritsu (will he remember?)**

**Second pov; Yukina (What was it that he painted?)**

**Third pov; Sinful (got a problem with that?) **

**Enjoy~**

* * *

The heart never forgets.

Especially if the memories are important then the heart will always remember them.

A person however can forget.

They can forget and chose to ignore their hearts screams or they can take in a breath, close their eyes, and listen closely to what the heart has to say.

Then there are people like me.

Who close their eyes, concentrate and concentrate, but the heart is too wounded to speak. Then as time progresses; the heart's demand to be heard slowly fades away leaving you to feel dead inside.

At least I still have that dream to go by.

It's been 2 months now and my memories still refused to come back. It was ok to bear in the beginning but now I feel like screaming.

Why can't I remember?

Who was that guy in my dream?

Why does my heart ache when thinking about him?

So many questions with no answers. I'm so tired of this I don't even bother to listen to my surroundings. I want to, desperate to recover my memories.

I spend day and night trying to gain my memories back. Begging my heart to speak again and that I am listening so very much. But it's futile.

What must I do to regain the memories I lost?

Then there's the fact I'm isolated here in this damn room. Takano goes ape shit when someone tries to see me. I don't understand him.

He's hiding something from me I know it but he refuses to tell me. The same goes to all my family who managed to see me.

My mother

Father

Aunts

Sinful

They're all keeping a secret from me and I'm just sick of it.

Sick of it but too drained emotionally to yell or lash out at them

The door to my right, in the hall of the room opens. I hold my breath as the steps come near to the bedroom. The clacks of shoes echo through these silent walls but I'm not afraid.

I know who it is.

It's that man again. The badass looking prince guy. I chuckle softly at the thought. Maybe I'll cross out badass; he's far to kind looking to be intimidating, like a cuddly teddy bear.

For some reason I don't feel like a zombie around him. He's the high light of my days when I'm alone or plainly bored. When Takano san is at work and isn't stalking me, he sneaks in here to speak to me or I go to the art room to draw and paint with him.

I like our secret friendship though he still refuses to tell me his name.

"How are you feeling today Ritsu?" he sits in the chair besides my bed smiling that sweet smile though I can tell it's a bit forced "Remember anything today?"

I shake my head smiling apologetically "Sadly no" I'm just glad my arm is healing fast! "But that dream keeps reoccurring." Thoughtfully thinking I absent mindlessly say out loud "But come to think of it. For a while now that guy reminds me of you. The voice though fuzzy fits you."

Doink!

"Hey…can I ask you something mister…" I wait until he nods then cautiously ask away "You…you think that that dream is a memory?"

Gulping when that smile drops, he murmurs softly "Yeah it is."

_**Ba-bump!**_

Oh my god…

"Ok…here's another question." Calm down me, calm down "Would that man in the dream happen to be you?"

Bam!

He doesn't answer me but his eyes widen and I catch a spark of hope. Am I right? Is that guy really him? My heart races to the discovery but the only thing remains is why I remember that (in a way) but nothing else or his name?

Speaking of names…

Reaching out slowly I place my hand on his large one.

"Can you…" he looks at me quizzically "Can I know your name now?"

I feel that if I know his name things will clear up. I just need to know his name.

Silence greets me.

"Please?"

"…"

Desperate now, I pull a bit on his sleeve "Please. Ever since I got out that hospital nothing makes sense! I feel as if my whole world shattered and I don't know where to start picking up the pieces!" my tears over takes me now "Please I beg you…how do I begin to pick up the pieces?"

When I said that, my head throbbed as an image played. Unlike my dream it was clear showing me crying talking to the tall prince guy.

_"I gave up everything" I said trembling in a seat. The dead feeling was back mixed with so much rage it burned me inside. _

_"He broke me in high school too…" I continue telling the prince guy as he looked down on me "W-why did I go back? I gave up my pride for him. Came out to my parents for him. I took that painful jump to trust him again…only to be broken…again." _

_Overwhelmed by everything I seem to have bottled up inside, I stiffen slightly when he hugs me close, securing me safely in his chest as I finish my story._

_"And I hate that my heart still beats for him." Why? When he broke me? "How? How….do I begin to pick up the pieces?" _

_With soothing circle motions he rubs my back hoping it consoles me but succeeded in making a butterfly flutter in my stomach. _

"You…" I stare at him with wide eyes now more desperate then before to know his name. "What is your name? What are you to me? Please tell me!"

Shaking his head, sighing, he pulls away from me.

"You know who I am Ritsu" he caresses my cheek "You know what I am to you, you just have to remember."

Before leaving out the door, he stops and smiles a sad smile before leaving these words to me.

_"Let me pick up the picture."_

_**Ba-bump! Ba-bump!**_

No…don't leave me.

* * *

"You…" he stares at me with wide eyes looking now more desperate then before to know my name. "What is your name? What are you to me? Please tell me!"

Shaking my head and sighing, I pull away from him sadly.

"You know who I am Ritsu" caresses his soft cheek "You know what I am to you, you just have to remember." Your so close. Please hurry and remember love.

Before leaving out the door, I stops and smile a sad smile before leaving this hint to him.

_"Let me pick up the picture."_

That is what I said to him when I realized I love him. That faithful day we confronted our exes.

That look of don't leave me didn't go unnoticed by my eyes and it hurts me to see him like that but I can't back down.

I'm scared.

Who will he pick when he remembers?

It scares me to the core thinking about it.

I'm sorry love, so sorry.

"Well that was stupid."

* * *

**"Well that was stupid"** I say behind Yukina's bro's back "He's begging to remember, you could have told him your name. Would've save you a lot of trouble you know?"

I heard the whole thing from outside and Ritsu bro did sound like he is remembering some things again.

If only this coward of a man here would grow some balls already and tell Ritsu bro his name. I would do it but nah. I believe the person Ritsu bro loves should tell him.

I watch as said prince man solemnly walks away.

Bet he's going to the art room again.

I wonder what he's painting in there.

Perhaps I shall bother him later. God I'm starting to talk like my aunt Kamijou. Better stay away from her for a while before I end up girly and mushy.

Yuck!

I fix my bunny hat (the damn hat keeps falling over my eyes) and turn to walk down the hall when I see a certain possessive ex coming back from work.

"Yo!" I say dripping with anger "Coward"

"Not you again shortie" che! "What do you want" he growls.

"You should hurry up and tell Ritsu bro Yukina's name and then go rot in some gutter."

I get a kick out of it when he glares bloody murder at me.

"Haha! But seriously, you know as well as I (a child) do that this zombie of a man is not Ritsu bro. it's in your eyes that you still care for him Takano douche and want him to be happy but you don't want to be lonely yourself."

He stops glaring looking taken aback as if I spoke his mind. Which I did "deep down you know this is only killing him. If you love him and actually want to make everything up to him at least give him the truth of knowing who Yukina is and let HIM pick who he wants to stay with."

Understanding and regret clouds those amber eyes and I know I have won.

You see I can read people well. Plus the fact I eased dropped on him and that Yokozawa person a while back so I know what the douche was talking about. I heard him say he didn't want to be alone and other stuff.

The real master mind here is me.

Pull the right heart string and you get just about anyone to obey you.

Don't worry Ritsu bro; everything will fall in place starting now.

My lips curved upwards as I skipped through the halls and to Hiro bro's room knocking on it. When he doesn't answer, I sigh. Same old Hiro bro. when will he learn he can't lock me out.

Smiling evilly, I take out my camera and knock the door down.

Inside on the bed have a nice game of wrestle, the two married boys stop in shock as I avalanche them taking tons of photos.

"Sinful you little bastard!" Hiro bro turns a deep shade of red (and not from angerX) "Get the fuck out now before I skin you and give me that camera!"

"Hell no."

"Why you…mmmm!" I silence him by jumping on the bed on his face between him and Nowaki.

"Assemble the family Hiro bro! Our plan is falling in place as we speak!"

When I finish speaking and taking more pics, I run for dear life back out the room.

"REMEMBER TO GATHER THE FAMILY YOU RABBITS IN HEAT!"

* * *

**There we have it!  
**

**Now onto some news shall we.**

**Ritsu, Sinful, mind to tell our readers the news?**

**Ritsu; Thank you everyone for you reviews and feedback. they mean a lot to neko san. You have come this far so...**

**Sinful; THE STORY IS ENDING!**

**Ritsu; O_O**

**Sinful; what? Neko chan didn't tell you Ritsu bro? *smirks* we have just one more chapter to go.**

**Ritsu; ... *cricket sounds* **

**Sinful; *stares cutely***

**me; REVIEW!**


	29. love IS picking up the pieces

**_This is it my sweet sweet readers!_**

**_Names~_**

**_Imagine Wings; Heeeheee~ you will see the point of views:) i did 4 povs! lol i hope you enjoy and thank you for the feedback!  
_**

**_DeathNoteLover235; lol thanks again for your awesome review:)_**

**_HiguraSHi18990; You b-day is today?! O.O well happy birthday! XD and i managed to make this a bit long so enjoy! and also for you last review, you draw! that's cool! May i see some of your work PLEEEEEEAAAAASSSSE!  
_**

**_demonsnight; Here it is!_**

**_pink frozen rose; Your welcome and thank you for Mr. Pinecone *Smiles* Also yup this is the end though i might make a epilogue or something. you'll see why later:/_**

**_hiyokocchi; thank you for the encouragement as well! if not for people like you guys i probably would have not pushed myself:D _**

**_The valkyrie goddess; :3 Yokozawa is the only one with sense. that's all i can say lol._**

**_Kage no Hato; Thanks and here! *gives ice cream* enjoy!_**

**_xXDark15AngelXx; Lol thanks and here's the update! So relax and enjoy and yah~ i got another one to like the YukinaXRitsu pairing! *dances in joy*_**

**_So here we are my fellow friends._**

**_This is it._**

**_1 Pov; you know her and her ways~ Sinful!_**

**_2 Pov; What will he do~ Takano!_**

**_3 Pov; The man himself~ Ritsu!_**

**_4 Pov; And lastly~ Yukina!_**

**_enjoy~_**

* * *

_"Dearly beloved! We are gather here today in holy matrimony to—"_

_"Stupid brat, get on with it!"_

_Stand in the center of the dinner table surrounded by my family except for a certain brunet one. My left eye twitches at my cousin's Hiro bro's words._

_"Shut the hell up or I'll post you little 'match' on youtube you stupid literature teacher" giggle sweetly, I beam when he blushes and sits back down._

_"Punk"_

_"Anyways~!" going back to the rest of my lovely family "before I was so RUDELY interrupted" glare "This is what I think we should do!"_

_Silence_

_"Doesn't ANYONE know what I am talking about?"_

_Blank stares_

_Face palm!_

_"Che! Ritsu bro's birthday! It past and we all forgot like idiots hello~!"_

_Wow my family is slow. I think amused as all eyes wide ridiculously big looking like balloons ready to pop._

_All at once people jump up exclaiming one thing over another._

_Oh how I love chaos~_

_"Shush!" but we have plans that need to be dealt with if I want my plan to work._

_I already taken care of Yukina's attitude, made Takano douche guiltier (hopefully he finally breaks), all that's left is this and Ritsu bro._

_"What do we do?!" auntie Onodera cries "We were so caught up with him in that coma we forgot!"_

_Heehee~ _

_This is my cue._

_"That's why I have an idea!" it's amusing how things play out my way._

_Just thinking about my plan makes me want to die laughing._

_"And what is your plan Sinful" mama asks, I see the hope in all the women faces. _

_Curving into a smile, I hold out my arms like I'm welcoming them in an embrace._

_"We'll throw Ritsu bro a party!"_

Yes this is all falling into place. Ritsu's ex is debating with himself as we speak. I know it (only because I stuck a mini microchip in his room.) he's talking to himself about what to do.

As for the two tragic lovers~

Avoiding each other (They started after that conversation in the room) at all cost is not going to make this any easier. With the party, they're going to HAVE to be around the other.

With the help of this family we might finally have or Ritsu bro back whole.

I think this party will be interesting if I do say so myself.

One of the party store suppliers came in carrying a vase of baby romantica. The porcelain glass reflected off me allowing me to see the ugly crimson color of my eyes.

Disgusted, I scrunched up my nose making a face.

I should remember not to look at the vases during the party. I don't need to see those ugly red pukes and be reminded of why I have those eyes.

Taking a deep breath I put my smile back on and skip off to find my dear still bedridden cousin. Awe look at him, wrapped up in his bed, oblivious of what's to befall him.

Giggling, I move close to his ear.

"Ritsu dear~" I mock auntie Onodera "Time to WAKE THE FUCK UP!" screaming in his ear I crack up when he tries his best to jump up with only one hand.

"S-sinful!?"

"Yo!"

"Why would you scream in my ear?"

Giggling again I say "Because you have to get ready if you want to make it to the party silly."

"What party?"

"Your birthday party. It's a bit overdue but it's still a party none the less."

A moment of silence passes.

"I don't want to go."

Tsk. Thought so.

"Now Ritsu~" I mimic he's mother, my aunt, and sit beside him on the bed "You can't keep holing yourself in here forever. Who knows, your friends might be there waiting for you."

No answer.

"Come on~~~!"

Nothing.

"You're starting to tick me off and you claim to be the grown up."

He down rights ignores me and hides under the blankets.

Keh! "THAT'S IT! GET THE FUCK UP YOU PUSSY AND FACE THE PARTY LIKE A MAN!" I know you're dying to see Yukina! The eyes say all.

Don't let this last chance slip away.

With a strong firm grip, I yank those blankets of him earning an "EEEEEK!" in reply.

"Now" smiling at my family once again "I am not leaving until you are ready and out this room. You have an hour or else~"

* * *

Ok I made my decision.

Since this morning I have been fighting with myself, debating to tell Onodera the truth or continue to leave him clueless.

A morning of heartache and tears.

I love Rit— Onodera. I truly do but I don't deserve him.

I knew this since High school that he was never meant to be mine. An angel like him doesn't belong to the devil like me.

Look at the things I did to him.

Onodera…I love and will always love you.

But…

You deserve better than me.

That stupid white haired bunny hat wearing shit is right.

After all the shit I out you through, you do have the right to know the name of you lover, and for me to move aside and let you pick who your heart wants.

Though I already know the answer to that.

As day falls, evening comes, and the party begins.

Happy couples are dancing, spinning each other on the dance floor as I remain against the wall in the shadows.

Observing their faces, all happy and glowing with love for one another.

My heart aches even more but my resignation remains strong as I continue searching for that little newbie of mine.

There he is.

With crutches trying in vain to escape the party.

Sighing deeply, I put my stoic mask back in its place then make my way over to the beautiful creature. Like my motto says, I won't put up with half asses. So I won't back down from my decision.

"Onodera" my voice betrays my face but he doesn't notice. Taking his good arm lightly, I pull him down the empty hallway and into my room.

"Takano san? Why are we in here?" slight fear shows in those blank eyes. I'm sure he isn't even aware of the emotion present with his voice betraying that fear.

Swallowing a lump that formed itself in my throat, with a heavy heart I make out the words.

"I have something to tell you, I think you should know."

* * *

You know I actually want to hug Takano san right now for getting me out of the party. I never liked my family when they throw parties.

It's always over the top.

Why can't we just have one SIMPLE party for once?

They say it is simple but how is a glass stature of an angel considered simple for parties?

Takano san pulls me in his room and I can't help but quiver from uneasiness. The way he pulled me seems he's dragged me places before very often.

"Takano san?" I do my best not to shake "Why are we here?" what is the reason you pulled me a very creepy aura room.

Eying me intently with that stoic face of his, I literally believed he was burning a hole in the center of my face.

"I have something to tell you, I think you should know."

The room magically darkened as that indifferent face fell baring his emotions for me to see as clear as day.

Any other day I believed I would have rejoiced in victory but no. This just further intensifies the atmosphere around us. I quite tempted to shake him and yell for him to go back to the ass he is.

Licking my lips that have gone dry now, I offer a strain chuckle "Well what is it?" please hurry up so I can escape. The party seems much more preferable than this.

Sighing, he motions me to sit on the bed.

Flinching a bit I obey if this makes the conversation ends faster.

He sits beside me raking a hand through his black mane. "Onodera…" that face frowns more "I don't know if this would help but you deserve to know."

Ok anyone besides me get this creepy feeling?

Without warning he pulls me in his arms "I'm sorry"

Hah?!

"I'm so, so sorry Ritsu…"

"Um…Takano san?"

This is just down right frightening. He's not trying to kill me is he?

"Ano…what are you talking about?"

"Last and this year." My heart jumps "I was a jerk, no, a damn straight cock to you. We were dating and everything was going fine but then I fucked it up. I would hurt you, insult you, and cheated on you."

What?!

My chest burns with an emotion of vile hate and sadness. I don't understand it.

Us?

Dating?

Please…then why don't I deny it?

"I hurt you so badly to the point of suicide…"

That's a lie.

_Remember _

"Then this year…"

A sick joke…

_Remember everything_

"You met some man that managed to take you from me."

I vowed not to love again.

_Don't ignore your heart_

"I don't want to let you go Onodera, I love you, I always had and always will. I don't want to let you go like I said but I don't want you miserable anymore."

"Stop…"

"I put you through so much but I want to…to make it u-up." Mister mighty breaks down sobbing into my chest.

My bipolarity begins leaking out at this.

"I'm so damn sorry"

Pity

"You deserve happiness…"

Love

"I just wish I can still be the man to give it to you."

Heartache

Betrayal

"That man with the prince looks Onodera, he's—"

Hop—

"STOP IT!" I shout covering my ears to block the feelings away.

These feeling are so familiar and yet foreign.

I don't like them at all!

I feel as if there's two people in me fighting for dominance!

"Why are you telling me this?! What are you talking about?"

He holds me tight, arms around my waist as I thrash to escape. "No! you have to hear this." No! I want to escape…don't I?

I don't need unwanted emotions.

_Are they unwanted?_

….

With one hand he pulls my head to his lips tickling my ear as the words fly into them

"Yukina…Kou."

_The magic words spoken unlocking the memories which were hidden to come to light._

Hnn…?

When did I black out?

Slowly I get up only to come face to face with my boss again. This time he was sitting in a chair. I remember now.

What Takano was talking about.

I remember all the abuse he did.

The nightmares he caused me.

My depression.

Then I remember my savior.

The day life meant nothing anymore, I was saved by a guy just as broken as I was.

Yukina

I remember everything at last.

His smile

Laugh

His warm embrace that makes me feel or so safe as he pledged to pick up the pieces of my broken heart.

Yukina…

"Do you remember now?" my ex questions, sadness in his eyes.

Chocking a sob down I nod.

"Why?" it makes no sense for a guy like Takano. The man that tore me from inside as well as out. "Why did you help me remember?"

Shrugging he lowers his head "I really do love you but I learned it's not my place to tie you down. I just want you to be happy again I guess."

My heart twitches towards him and I can't help but smile a sincere tiny smile. "Takano san" leaning forward I cup his face in my good hand.

"Thank you, I mean it." So demon of an editor really does care. This is the Saga I remember from years ago.

"You know a heart can never forget. You were my first love and I will always love you but I am not **IN** love with you like I was in high school. We were trying desperately to hold on to those memories of High school instead of letting go that we became mad. When I met Yukina, he fixed me. He allowed me to truly love again, **HE** is my soul mate and I honestly hope that you find your soul mate as well Takano san."

You might have been a bastard that broke me into nothingness but i can't hold a grudge.

You were my paradise once and Yukina is my heaven for as long as i live. I'm glad you understand that now my first love.

I give him one last kiss on the lips then leave saying a soft "Goodbye"

I have to find Yukina.

* * *

"COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME OOOOOOON!"

Sinful continues pulling the back of my shirt begging (more like demanding) I go outside to the party and dance with Ritsu.

"NOW!"

"I can't"

"I command you!"

I know she wants to help her cousin remember me but I can't. Every time he doesn't remember crushes my soul.

It's not fair.

Life is just not fair!

Not for Ritsu or me or his family!

I just want Ritsu to remember again…

"Come on you pussy! Put the paint brush down and we'll go to down together!"

My patient finally snaps that I firmly shove his off. I'm about to scream at her NO but another voice cuts me off.

"Yukina!"

My heart jumps.

"Yukina where are you!"

I-is this real?

"Yukina please answer!"

Does this mean he…

"Kou!" bam the art doors slam opening revealing an obvious tired looking brunet. He was panting and drenched in sweat, it was clear he ran with his broken leg. Pain yet determination glowed on those shinning eyes I missed so much.

Stunned and standing like a deer about to get hit with a car I stupidly say "What?"

With his head lowered I hear his soft voice "You are an idiot."

Heart cracking I choke "W-wha…"

"Let me pick up the pieces" my words are said back to me. "You said that to me after I hit my head on the toilet bowl of the hospital. You said that so why…why didn't you tell me your name when I forgot?"

Tears fall down to the floor making me feel ashamed.

I know it was selfish and I was leaving Ritsu a little just to test him.

And to hear the sobs in his sweet voice makes me feel much more disgusted with myself.

Going to him, I sob as well "Ritsu I'm sorry I didn't mean—"

"I don't want to hear it" was all he said before pulling me in a deep kiss.

Our tears and spit mingled as we kissed feverously. The pounding of our heart can be heard as they beat faster with each kiss.

God how I missed this, him, in my arms.

We break for air looking I into each others eyes, tears rimming them.

"I really am sorry Ritsu" I breathe with my last tear falling.

Smiling up at me, my love wipes my tear with his good hand. "If you are truly sorry then I expect you to make it up to me."

My heart swells with glee seeing he's not mad at me. That dark hole in my core fills up becoming whole once more.

In these past months I smile my true happy smile.

"Anything love" I bring my forehead to his while chaste kissing his lips "Tell me and I shall do it."

Giggling "You never did fulfill that promise of teaching me to paint like you. I still suck at it."

Laughing heartily at that I agree "Alright, a promise is a promise."

Wait a tick

"Holding on" I pull away to go by the painting I was finishing. Walking back to my beautiful love I hold the canvas for him to see it. "I started it days ago but I finished it today. I painted it for you, my one and only love."

Tears gather in his eyes again as he looks over my gift. It's a painting of him dressed in all white under a giant sakura tree. The pedals as well as his hair blows with the wind and he is smiling that smile I love so much accompanied by that cute blush. In his hands there is a full healed heart. Not broken, healed, and shiny with so much life.

"I love it" soft arms encircle me "I love it with all my heart just as I love you _Kou._"

Standing there looking like weirdos with our cast legs and just holding each other, we smile, finally able to move on from our exes with each other.

I love him with my everything and though we can't predict what lies ahead of us I'm sure we are strong enough to stay together forever even when we start breaking into pieces.

Because that is what true love is.

It is picking up the pieces of the one you love.

* * *

**_And there we have it *sigh*  
_**

**_It's like all my children are beginning to grow up *cries*_**

**_any who~_**

**_While i was typing the last part i stopped and remembered pink frozen rose. i promised her i would make a lemon scene in the end but then i though "wait how are they gonna make love when they have broken legs and ritsu has a broken arm?!"_**

**_So i cut it out which means~~~_**

**_you guys are in luck;)_**

**_pink frozen rose, people, i shall give you a choice._**

**_I can;_**

**_1; make a epilogue with ending credits (like the movies) then add the lemon _**

**_or_**

**_2; forget the epilogue and make a nice little lemon one shot;)  
_**

**_And i'm still debating on making this pair into a Mpreg sequel-_- _**

**_do not judge me, i'm a fan of Mpreg;3_**

**_So~~~ review, share with nekocandy your wonderful thoughts._**


	30. epilogue

**~The epilogue~**

* * *

Here we are at last.

Yukina and I had to wait the rest of the year for our limbs to finally heal but we didn't mind. We had each other to keep ourselves company. Takano san and they went back to Japan; their jobs here came to an end.

I felt relief and happiness when Takano let me go and decided to get somewhat along with Yukina. Now I'm comfortable to know they won't try to kill each other and I won't be getting anymore broken legs.

Kisa however I never thought would try to kill me.

Yeah I got that hatred vibe from him but knowing he was what put me in that accident…let us just say I hope to never come across him again.

He's in prison thanks to Sinful and if he ever gets out and goes back to Japan, Isaka says he won't be able to work at the company. Thank you Isaka san; if he weren't so hard to handle I would bow to him.

Anyways, I and Yukina are heading back home tomorrow night. My parents will be staying a bit longer to stabilize some business and Hiroki and Nowaki san decided to leave the day after we leave.

Yup everything is calm now.

"Ne Ritsu" Yukina sweet voice flows gently down my neck as I feel him trailing some kisses. We were sleeping in bed.

"Hm?"

His hands begin to roam my body pinching one nipple. I let out a moan trying to turn around in his arms.

"Can we do it?"

God knows I'm thinking yes but all that leaves my lips are more moans. Yukina gets the hint either way and he covers my body with his own. Removing each others clothes, our lips dance that dance together not all tired of each others taste.

We only crave more.

"Ah…K-Kou..!" I pant clutching his broad shoulders, digging my nails in him as he penetrates me slowly. "Uh god…"

Our mouths latch onto each other again moaning each other names and he moves his hips. Slowly at first then faster going in a steady pace.

I feel him twitch inside me; hear the irregular beating of his heart, as the sweat drips from his skin. It feels so good. To be joined with the man you love.

To be one.

"I love you Ritsu" he comes inside me then falls on my body.

"I love you too Kou" I giggle tiredly panting but content.

Smiling at each other while catching our breath and slowing our beating hearts, we kiss one last time and drift into a blissful sleep. Here in each other arms, we look forward to the future and what it shall bring.

* * *

On the other side of the city, there standing tall and menacingly was a prison house. Inside this dump I sit on my cot staring at the wall.

Not exactly at nothing but not really at the anything here.

My demon inside turns dangerously knowing that stupid big eye brat isn't dead!

It's a sin he didn't do what I wanted and die like a good little shit is supposed to! And then that white hair brat! It's all her fault I got caught.

If I get out of here I'll be sure to rid her off first so she won't get in the way next time.

Yes…next time.

Nobody will get between us next time Yukina. I'll be sure to eliminate Ricchan for taking your heart away from me. Don't you worry, we'll be together again just you wait and see.

Eyes darkening, a demented giggle escapes my throat.

Next time~

_**I will not fail.**_

* * *

**Once again this has been a blast writing this for you:)**

**It was just so much fun letting these voices in my head out on paper lol**

**But alas~**

**It is the end but fear not because MOST of you were giving some wonderful thoughts for my sequel debate;)**

**And I conjured a pretty much somewhat good summary for it.**

**The summary;**

_**Two years have passed; two years of chaos and obstacles but now our couple's love is deepen beyond anything else. Everything is now perfect but what happens when a little accident happens and they find a cute knocked up Ritsu? If this isn't enough what will Yukina do when a certain chibi raven is released from prison and finds out about their soon to be child?**_

**There you have it but I'm not sure when I'll post it. I have some unfinished homework to get off my back-_-**

**Damn school.**

**Always find time to make mine hell.**

**Til next time~**

**Nekocandy**

**:3**


End file.
